


Waiting Like A Ghost

by xXDawnXx



Category: EXID (Band), EXO (Band), Mamamoo, Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Depression, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Self-Discovery, Sexual Tension, Suicidal Thoughts, longfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-16
Updated: 2019-09-16
Packaged: 2020-10-19 23:48:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 31,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20665829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xXDawnXx/pseuds/xXDawnXx
Summary: Minseok couldn't believe how his life was flipped on its head. From the ordinary: reading love letters as an RJ and having a girlfriend, to the extraordinary: being part of a murder investigation against a serial killer who goes by the name of Heartless. Not to mention that this brought along Detective Luhan, who made him feel things he knew he shouldn't.





	Waiting Like A Ghost

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt 18
> 
> RJ Minseok reads out love notes on his show. Detective LuHan listens to the show a couple of times and realises that some notes are actually clues of the case he's currently working on.  
Also, Minseok has a girlfriend, but while working on the case with LuHan, he can't help but feel things for him he's not supposed to.  
Plus 1: Cussing, sexual tension, angst, smut (only if it helps the romance in the story), the best first kiss ever.  
Minus 1: None
> 
> Hi! This is my first time writing for a fest, and writing for Xiuhan! I'm actually quite nervous to post this, not only because I didn't think it would be so long, but I don't know whether I gave the prompter what they wanted (it's my first time writing a kiss and smut scene, so lol I'm sorry if it sucks). I finished this pretty last minute, but I can say that I'm really happy with how it turned out- I feel like I did my OTP proud *^-^*. I've been an EXO-L since 2016, and even though Luhan had already left EXO by then, I still loved him and all the EXO-M members with all my heart, and wanted to write for Xiuhan. 
> 
> (By the way, if anyone doesn't know, Ge means older brother and it's a Chinese term, basically a parallel to hyung.)
> 
> The title comes from the song Human by Krewella. I love the song in general, but the song fits the main character's emotions and turmoils, and specifically, also kind of helps the reader to try and guess the killer. Honestly, there isn't must mystery to it, but I do hope it's still thrilling to read on.
> 
> I hope you enjoy and please tell me if there are any mistakes, so I can change them. I want to especially thank my twin sister for spending three hours reading over this with me, she's truly the best.
> 
> Hopefully, I can write more Xiuhan in the future, and thank you again. Love you guys, xoxo.
> 
> (Btw I'm on twitter @xXDawnXx1 so I'm always available to talk ^^)

Submerged in warm water, complimentary rose petals surrounding him, Minseok snapped his head up as he gasped for air. He had been interrupted from his bath by an annoyed meowing from the other room, and he could already imagine the new scratches that his bathroom wall would accumulate. Rolling his eyes, he stood up carefully, drained the bath (making sure to pick up all the stray rose petals first), and rinsed himself with a quick shower, rubbing shampoo over his black hair to soothe the head pangs he knew were from not sleeping enough. The meowing only got louder and almost pitiful sounding, so Minseok decided to skip the face routine and grabbed his indigo bathrobe. As expected, he was greeted by his beautiful cat, looking up at him unblinkingly as he demanded for food by rubbing his head on his ankles. With a happy little sigh, he began refilling the bowl as he hummed his way to the kitchen. Minseok had been pleasantly surprised by how the one-room apartment had looked when he had first furnished it- a connected kitchen and dining area with tiled flooring, as well as a view of Seoul at night. It was perfect. As his cat munched happily to himself, Minseok crouched down and rubbed at his fluffy ears, making a plenary in his head of the day. Since he had already cleaned the apartment (hence the treat with the bath), all he had to do was eat, get changed and go to work. Playing music from his playlist as background music, he quickly dressed in a casual hoodie and jeans, before kissing Tan and telling him to be a good boy.

Even though it was already Autumn, the weather was still warm enough that he didn’t need to take his coat. As Minseok walked with the crunching leaves as symphony below his feet and traversed through the practised route to work, Minseok uncharacteristically began to reminisce as to how he got the job. He remembered that ever since he was young, he had wanted to be a detective, but he never felt good enough to pursue such a career, knowing that he already had more skill in the media industry. When in university, he was recruited by a younger guy called Sehun to be in his Radio Jockey club simply because he had ‘liked his voice’- Minseok at the time hadn’t known how fun of a job it would be. At first, it was simply a normal broadcasting club in which he relayed news, along with his best friends since kindergarten, Chanyeol and Baekhyun. Meanwhile, Sehun was the one behind the scenes, working on the sound mixing and selecting the tracks that the students requested. While that had been one of the great activities he had cherished as a university student, his ambitions had soared to want to try doing more things with the RJ club. Discussing ideas with Sehun, they eventually hit the jackpot- Minseok was going to read love letters. His obsession with love letters began when he was a quarter of his father’s height, and his father had been reading a love letter from his wife that she had written over a decade ago.

“What are you reading, daddy?” Minseok had asked, pulling the waist of his dad’s trousers as a force of habit to gain his attention. The calm look on his dad’s face had sparked in surprise before smiling at his son and pulling him up affectionately to allow him to sit on his lap.

“I’m reading your mum’s love letters to me, Minseokie,” his dad had spoken softly, with an enamoured look in his visage. Cocking his head slightly, Minseok pursued with his line of questioning. 

“What’s a love letter?” His dad contemplated the answer for a bit, wondering how to explain the concept of love to his 6-year-old.

“Well… when you have deep feelings for someone, almost like your heart being warm when they are around you, then you can write a letter to express your feelings. And that’s what your mum did to make me fall in love with her- she wrote these letters while thinking of me, waiting for the right moment. I hadn’t really noticed her at the time, but when she gave me these letters, I felt that warm feeling. You should try to find that warm feeling too, my dear son.”

Growing older and taller, his fascination with love letters never ceded. Not only because of how they lead directly to his existence, but because of how his mother was the one who wrote the love letters, rather than his dad, showing him the universality of the medium. When bothering his mother about the love letters, she always donned a pretty pink hue on her cheeks as she described the hours she spent trying to formulate her feelings into words, since she hadn’t had the courage to actually use spoken words. In his teens, his dad had actually allowed him to read one of the letters, and Minseok could still remember how embarrassing it had been. Not because of how sentimental the letter had been, but because of the rawness and tenderness of the emotions, which he hoped that he could one day truly feel. 

Sehun had instantly loved the idea of reading love letters, screaming “Let’s do this, hyung!” in his adorable way. At first, it had been a short segment since people only sent in two to five letters once a week to be read to a special someone. They came in all forms; from long and poetic, to short and sweet. Some were anonymous, while others wanted their names to be revealed. The cutest segments for Minseok were when the other person replied with a letter of their own, also confirming that they felt the same way. Even though it wasn’t lifesaving work, he felt accomplished in the sense that in the same way his mother had got the courage to confess to his dad, he could also be a vehicle of courage for the young adults in his university. 

Unprecedentedly, his segment became extremely popular, people tuning in because who knew who was going to confess to who, especially since those confessing were usually from a different clique than the one they were confessing to. There was never a moment of boredom, and his segment was fervently talked about in campus as people talked directly to the subject of the letters to ask them whether they had heard the confession, and whether they would accept them. Even though rejections were just as regular as successful pairings, Minseok found that the most melancholic part of reading the letters was when both the subject and the person who wrote the letter were anonymous, since they would never get to actually express their feelings, and usually wrote to discard the love away. 

Whilst reading the letters, Minseok had become more comfortable with expressing his opinions at the end of each letter, always having encouraging words and thanks for the listeners. Maybe Sehun had been right about his voice, because people he had never known approached him constantly at university, talking about his segment and even asking for selfies with him, as if it was a bragging rite. 

Eventually, when it was graduation time, Minseok had been designated the role of the final speech, due to the explosive nature of his segment on love letters. He remembered talking about how his mum had done what the students were now doing, and he hoped that the tradition would continue so that people could pursue their love. What he hadn’t said was that the reason love letters were so compelling was due to the nature of writing letters- it took craftsmanship and time, qualities which seemed to be fading in the modern youth as they chased after quick fixes and confessions by text. While valid, the temporal ousia of love letters was still something that fascinated him even to this very day. So when he had finished the speech, he couldn’t help but cry as he didn’t know how he could achieve as much fulfilment as he had in the two years of being in the club. Even though he would never admit it to his sister, he was grateful that she had told him to go to the military as soon as high school ended, because it allowed him to meet Sehun and the other guys, who allowed him to express his passion.

Having seen Minseok’s tears at the graduation ceremony, while Minseok had gone job hunting, Sehun had dedicated himself to creating what was now known as Iridescence, the name of Sehun’s company, which consisted of having a radio show every day that was hosted by different RJs. Even though it was due to his parent’s immense riches, by having that same format as university and hiring Minseok, Baekhyun and Chanyeol, Iridescence expanded to be a fulltime job for Minseok that triggered the nostalgic feelings of doing something  important  that actually meant something to someone. And, it beat having a boring 9 to 5 desk job, so there was that advantage. 

Speaking of beating a normal job, he was standing in front of the five-story building, entering and pressing the elevator’s third-floor button where his colleagues were. As soon as he entered, he was met by an explosion of noise, Chanyeol and Baekhyun loudly singing as if drunkards in their RJ booths, while Hani was in her own booth reading a novel, and Wheein and Hwasa reported on the news. A cup of iced Americano hovered in front of his eyes, and he inclined his head slightly upwards to give a grateful smile to Sehun, the CEO of Iridescence.

“For you, hyung,” he smiled. Minseok took it and muttered a thanks, going to the quieter coffee area where they discussed the letters that Minseok had previously read. One addition from his high school format was the added use of songs and playlists being directed at the recipient too, alongside the letter. This had been the only solution when Sehun had felt that at the beginning of their enterprise, at the rate Minseok was going (speaking for five hours consecutively almost every day non-stop) would eventually make him lose his voice. Therefore, the alternative came in having people also send songs that they felt were meaningful, and it became a staple part of the format.

“When the two idiots finish, you can go in and do your segment. Seulgi will help with the setup today, if that’s okay.”

“Mmh, that’s fine. But don’t tell them that they’re idiots, or they won’t stop whining about it,” Minseok chuckled, which also had the younger male snickering.

They conversed amicably, the two already being friends for so long that it seemed surreal. Minseok was already 28, and almost everything seemed to be going right in his life. As he heard the final loud screams of goodbye from the dumb and dumber duo, he waved goodbye at Sehun before going in, getting swamped by and embrace from Chanyeol and Baekhyun. He couldn’t help but giggle at his childhood friends because even though they had known each other ever since Baekhyun bumped into him in kindergarten and Chanyeol had helped him up from the hard fall, they still insisted on being affectionate to each other.

“Guys get off, you’re suffocating me!” Minseok squealed, finally prompting the two to get off.    
  


“Ya, we haven’t seen you in a while because of your vacation, of course, we want to smother you,” Baekhyun pouted, and Minseok simply rolled his eyes before pushing the two forcefully out. The ‘vacation’ was honestly just going to his favourite countryside spot, driving for a day, staying there for a day and driving back for a day. Nothing exciting, but it was his place of peace.

Speaking of places where Minseok could be the most peaceful, he sat on the desk and looked at the new pile of letters to read. Delicately, he opened each letter and smoothed them down, browsing the contents quickly as Seulgi announced that he would be the next RJ with his segment, Heartthrob and counting him in “5..4...3...2-”.

“Hi! It’s your one and only Kim Minseok, a human cupid ready to read your love letters!” The jovial tone he had was sometimes hard to persist with, especially if life got in the way. But when he remembered the people that wanted to hear him deliver the love letters, he knew that he had to give it his best to show respect for them exposing their hearts. He read the first letter, which involved an anonymous guy professing his love to a girl named Mina. The letter was relatively short, simply stating aspects he liked about her, like her voice, or the way she crinkled her nose, and then asking if she would go out with him. 

Minseok made sure to stare at the camera from time to time, a newer feature in the past few years he had worked there, which gave a live feed to online watchers, which would later be put on Youtube to be consumed by the general public. Sehun was the one who had thought of adding it, since it would allow for more engagement as people wanted to know a face behind the voice. The only problem with the new business model was that Minseok actually had to come to work respectably, when he had usually just worn basic clothes, or even his pyjamas, as well as never bothering with his hair, especially if he had a hat. Now, he always had to make sure that his hair looked at least decent, and that his clothes were neat and pressed well. Today, he had gone for a more casual style, but at least his hair made up for the clothes, because he had made sure to get a haircut before his trip, so now he had a slightly long fringe with curled ends.

His routine of reading letters, commenting on them and then playing a song which he would minimally dance to went on for a few hours, and he was finally on the last letter of the day. His eyebrows arched imperceptibly at the last letter, because it was a typed letter rather than a handwritten one. The reason this was surprising was because Sehun and him, to manage an influx of letters, had decided that the best way to receive letters was by mail only, because doing it online would simply cause an influx of thousands or even millions of letters (as some people sent more than one letter), which would be too difficult to handle. By strictly having letters, it allowed for the letter intake to be more manageable and also for the letters to seem more sincere because they were handwritten. It was really unusual to have a person not handwrite the letter, but Minseok dismissed it.

“Okay, so this is the final letter. It’s an anonymous one, and from skimming through it, the loved one’s name isn’t mentioned either. It starts with:

‘Dear You. I love you. I need you now. You’re my everything. My oxygen. My life force. You are what spurs me to keep hunting. To keep going. All those before you were nothing in comparison to what you are now. I’m so lucky to have found you, to have loved you, to have owned you. Remember the beach we went to the other day? Oh, how you loved it. How you squealed in glee as I held you, the waves crashing on your body like a drum beat. Intoxicating. Invigorating. I just can’t get enough of you. It feels like I’m drowning in love for you, so let’s drown together until we die, my other sweetheart.’ “ 

Minseok paused, not really knowing what to say. It seemed like such a creepy letter, but maybe the person was using hyperbolic language. He composed himself before saying,   
“Well, it’s certainly an… interesting letter. I don’t know your name, so I’ll just give you one like I customarily do. I’ll call you… Sea, because of the references to water. Are you sure what you feel is love? It may be closer to an obsession, because while love is powerful, it can sometimes be all-consuming. So Sea, please re-evaluate your passion for the person you say you love, and if you feel like it isn’t healthy, talking to a friend or maybe going to therapy may help. If you are just more of a metaphorical writer, and I’m totally overreacting, then I hope that the person you love can experience as deep of feelings that you have! Now, let’s play the song that you requested… Evanescence, Going Under!”

He had never heard of the song, so he just sat and listened as Seulgi found it and played it out loud. Really, he had his own computer screen to play music, but Sehun said that others needed a job, no matter how mundane, to support each other. 

The song was haunting, the female voice singing slowly with a rock instrumental. Minseok couldn’t help but shiver when the lyrics ‘I’m going under, drowning in you’ first played, simply because it matched the letter’s contents. Minseok’s paranoia couldn’t help but multiply as the lyrics scarred into his very bone, kissing his toes and fingertips that lead to him flinching visibly. But he had a job to do, so he just bobbed his head silently until the song finished.

“Sea.. that was quite a depressing song. I hope that your love can be reciprocated, but if it’s not, please take care of 

yourself.”

  
… 

Luhan was aggressively chewing on his sandwich as he sat in his car, which was at the precinct’s parking lot. He knew he was being an unsociable prick again, but he hoped that they would understand his shifts in mood after years of working together. The brunette man was sure that they probably thought it was one of his several eccentricities, but  _ it really isn't, _ he thought as he gulped down his one of three pills a day to stay somewhat normal. Luhan still felt like crap, but at least he could emotionally drain himself on his own, rather than taking it out on his team. 

To try and stop being so abysmally miserable, he remembered how Tao had recommended a radio channel to him because he said he loved all the segments on there. Absentmindedly turning the knob to the channel as he chewed even more aggressively, a male voice started reciting something. At first, Luhan was confused, before he realised that by the sappiness of the contents, the RJ was reading a love confession of some sort- no wonder Tao liked it so much, he had a soft heart. 

Despite the cringiness he obtained from the second-hand embarrassment, Luhan decided to listen further, honestly a bit enchanted by the calming voice. After a while, the RJ finally said his name in the short break, and there was a name to the voice- Minseok. Gulping down the last remnants of his lunch, Luhan couldn’t help but smile as he enunciated the new name. Having been in Korea for only a few months, he only really knew the people at his precinct in his team, Team M (who were mostly Chinese, as they had been transferred to work on a serious case from China), so familiarising himself with someone else didn’t seem so bad. 

Team M was separated from the rest of the precinct in the sense that they got their own room and didn’t have a uniform. Luhan liked to think it was because they were such an elite force that had to blend in with the public, but the real reason was budgeting cuts. At least he could have fun picking out what style he wanted every day.

This had been four months ago, when he had made it his routine to listen to RJ Minseok. At first, he tuned in only when he trapped himself in the car. But as he got more intrigued by not only the person that was Minseok, but also at the content of the letters, it became a weekly occurrence, not needing to hide away from the world before he tuned in. Every week soon metamorphosed into every day, and he knew his team was getting worried about him, because he refused to be present at lunchtime. 

So, to be more present, he decided to buy a radio for their workroom and play the radio every lunchtime. Surprisingly, rather than chattering loudly, the squad would listen quietly while laughing or even crying along with the letters. It became an unexpected bonding activity, and as Luhan looked at Yifan, Yixing, Jongdae and Tao in their little office full of paper, files and occupied by desks that took up way too much space, he sported a small smile that day. 

“Ge, what are you smiling so creepily about?” Tao cackled from the other side of the room.

“He’s probably thinking about how cute Minseok looks,” Yixing muttered with a sleepy look on his face, even though he was, in fact, the one who worked the hardest in their little group. This remark left not only Luhan blushing and sputtering an excuse, but Jongdae screaming loudly in his corner, demanding details, while Yifan rolled his eyes at the immature boys in his vicinity, even though they were all so competent. 

Even though it seemed unbelievable, Yifan had actually a very competent team on his hands. As the leader, he didn’t have to coordinate them much, since they were usually intuitive enough to go about their day. Nonetheless, they were usually quite loud, which caused complaints from senior members of other departments. 

Specifically, their department dealt with serial killers- Yixing was in charge of profiling serial killers with his Psychology degree, and was extremely competent, but almost too obsessed with his job. Tao was a newer addition to their little family, and he was extremely skilled at finding information that seemed almost unattainable, finding secret records and hidden CCTV footage that incriminated a suspect. Even though he looked scary, he was actually just shy and had dark eye bags, but because he was struggling with learning Korean, he was side-lined as cold by others in the precinct. Which is why he had Jongdae stick close to him, as he was the resident translator for the Chinese group, especially for Tao. Jongdae was also extremely proficient at hacking and aided Tao when information was blocked. 

Then, there was Luhan, their best detective by far. He could link pieces of evidence like no other, and his hunches had a ridiculous success rate of being correct. Even in the field, he was a prolific police officer as he could target a shot perfectly, and had the most impressive rep sheet of bagging over 200 criminals. Even though his achievements couldn’t be overstated, Yifan suspected that the man had a mental illness of some sort, since he tended to have big mood swings, and sometimes couldn’t even turn up to work. Yifan chose not to discuss the issue because it had taken a while for Luhan to trust him, even if they had been the pair to know each other the longest after Luhan and Yixing, his platonic soulmate. If he pried now, he felt that Luhan would regress rather than improve. So when he began turning up at lunchtimes to play the radio, it had been a welcome change since it allowed for him to get closer to the rest and not seem so isolated. One problem it did bring though was the Captain storming in to complain at them for wasting time, and here he was coming n-

“Kris! What is the meaning of this?” Captain Kim Joonmyeon stormed in furiously with his perfectly fitting uniform. Yifan began lowering his head to look at his messy desk as he placed his hand on his forehead to massage it, ready for the oncoming headache. This only made the Captain more furious, who slammed the documents at Yifan’s desk, prompting the man to look up.

“Yes, my dear? And it’s Yifan, by the way.” Yifan breathed out with a scornful smile. At first, Yifan had called Joonmyeon dear by accident when he had first transferred here because Jongdae had pranked him by telling him that it meant senior. But from the reddened face and angry scowl of the Captain ever since, he still used it to bother him. While Joonmyeon’s face got more red, he deflected it, continuing on his tirade.

“Look, we almost sent a mistake to the forensics team! Who was the imbecile that wrote three extra orders for an autopsy on the same person?” The group looked at each other with suspicious glares, everyone giving a shrug of the shoulders.

“I blame Tao,” Luhan said on instinct.   
  


“What? It wa-wasn’t me! It was that bab-baboon!” Tao screeched while pointing at Luhan in a frenzy, which only got the two bickering in indistinguishable Chinese. Yifan couldn’t help but shake his head at Tao defending himself in broken Korean to Joonmyeon while angrily battling Luhan in Chinese, but the shenanigan was quickly stopped by Irene barging in and saying,

“Boss, it was the new recruit, Jongin. He said he’s really sorry and won’t make a mistake like that again.” 

Defeated but still angry, Joonmyeon told them to stop slacking before he left in a huff, which only led to the group sniggering to themselves.    
  


“Why does he hate you so much anyway?” Yixing muttered as he typed furiously on his MacBook. Yifan simply told them to get back to work.

What they hadn’t expected was for another serial killer to pop up on top of their high priority one, meaning that they not only had to do overtime, but they also would also have to work throughout lunchtime. It sucked because this second serial killer, Heartless, seemed to be what had brought them here from China. Heartless had killed only 6 people in China, but their style had been so distinct that when they seemed to resurface a few months ago, the Korean police knew they had needed a small group of experts on the case, which was how Team M was created. Even though they had gone silent, Heartless was still a huge threat to society, and Yifan would make sure that he would see them in prison…

The hectic group became even more disorganised in those hours of overtime, and when Luhan clicked that last print button, he couldn’t help but slouch on his seat in content. 

“Ok, you are all dismissed. Sorry for keeping you so long. To thank you guys for staying up so late, you can all come to work at 12 tomorrow and-”

“Really? You do realise that it’s already 3 am? I already can’t get my beauty sleep and-” 

“Shut up Tao,” they all chanted in collective tiredness. This got the youngest member to shut up, but he still managed to whimper sadly, leading to Jongdae comforting him on their shared ride home, since they lived in the same apartment building.    
  


“Who’s catching the guy then?” Luhan asked inquisitively, having wanted to be part of the reconnaissance team.    
  


“Probably me and the Captain,” Yifan said, not really looking forward to having to not only wake up early, but to also deal with the other man. Luhan nodded at the answer before grabbing Yixing to leave together.

As Luhan drove quietly, Yixing chattered about everything and nothing, leading to monosyllabic responses from the brunette. Yixing was his best friend, and he knew when he wasn’t in the right mood to converse, it was best if he left Luhan to his own thoughts. So when he dropped his friend off, Yixing gave him a warm dimpled smile before tapping his cheek, silently telling Luhan to cheer up. Driving to his own house, Luhan couldn’t help but think about how lucky he was to have such a comfortable squad. 

Exhausted, he took off his work clothes and badge, as well as turning on his laptop to get ready to sleep. It was another ritual that whenever he missed one of Minseok’s radio shows, he would give himself the treat to be able to watch him instead on Youtube. Just seeing his adorable smile and gestures made Luhan indescribably happy, such as when his hands unconsciously mirrored each other. He began nodding off by the third letter, enjoying Minseok’s new hairstyle, which made him infinitely hotter. As he was on the brink of sleep, the last words he heard were “drowning”, which prompted an uncomfortable nightmare.

Waking up in a sudden fit, Luhan’s eyes were now wide open. Luckily, his scattered rise from sleep hadn’t broken his laptop, but he felt an indescribable urge that he was close to making a break-through on one of his cases. As he quickly perused through the live stream he had left on his lap, his senses directed him to the last letter by the person Minseok had nicknamed Sea. Even though it didn’t seem like much, Heartless had recently killed their victim by using a dam. Moreover, the killer tended to cut a heart on the cheek of their victim, which Luhan had speculated to mean that they had a close relationship, probably romantic, with the victim. So, if they carved the heart before the victim was even dead, it seemed like the acts were more fuelled by revenge than by simply being cold and calculated. But because of how they usually killed indoors, the decomposition of the body was even harder to pinpoint precisely and quickly. Just maybe, Heartless was using letters as a sort of reverse calling card. 

Even though their killer had been more quiet, Luhan guessed that his plan of keeping them hidden from the public had made them more egotistical, which lead to them wanting to reveal themselves in a more public way. He wondered why specifically in the form of love letters, but at least now he had a lead. Not wanting to waste time (even with little sleep), he rushed to change himself to look presentable enough, barely registering that he would meet his radio crush soon. 

  
  
  


…

  
  
  


He ended the segment by listing the company’s Youtube channel and displaying a finger heart at the camera, Seulgi queuing in the ending with a “And three… Two… And one. That’s it Minseok oppa!” She smiled, small claps to signify the end of the workday for her. He gave her a bow and waved her off, before staying behind and collecting the letters, ensuring that they went in his bag. Once done with that task, he exited the booth to go into the company workroom adjacent to all the recording booths, where he would answer his emails from sponsors and find different subjects that the rest of the RJs could talk about. Tapping away on his own until midnight, the letter still couldn’t get out from his brain, as it gnawed at him to no end. A pat on his shoulder made Minseok involuntarily jump, only to see that it was just the new intern telling him that his girlfriend was there to pick him up. Minseok cursed at himself, before bowing politely to the intern, knowing now why he had the constant nagging feeling that he had forgotten something.

Ara, Minseok’s girlfriend of six months, had been his first serious relationship. She was beautiful- large eyes, double eyelids with a small frame and dark locks. Yet, while Minseok was more quiet and reserved, she was loud and dominated in social situations. He had met Ara when he had been on holiday in China, in the city of Beijing, and there had been a Korean tour guide highlighting key places in the city. Ara had mysteriously latched onto him, probably because he was the only person around her age, the rest being families and grandparents. 

Ara was two years older than him, yet acted childish as she threatened to fall in rivers and even tried to drag him along. Yet, it had been fun. When she had kissed him that night, it had been a bit awkward, but he guessed that it felt nice. So he wrote her a letter there and then- something he had never done before. It was messy, unclear and stupid, in hindsight, but the adrenaline made him feel that it was the right thing. Maybe this time, it could work.

Reading the contents of the letter, she had laughed at his face. It had stung, the high from writing descending like a rushing waterfall. She told him to seduce her properly as a man should. So, the next day, he bought her roses and chocolates, which she accepted. Even now, Minseok wouldn’t say that he was in love with her. Yes, he did love her, but he believed that with time, he would get that warm feeling his dad had told him about that he still didn’t fully understand in adulthood. But what they had at the end of the day was comfortable- a nice companionship of opposites.

One thing he really didn’t like about her was that she rarely understood boundaries- she would come constantly uninvited to his workplace, even though she knew that he enjoyed his privacy. Even now, as it was 1 am in the morning, he couldn’t understand why she insisted on seeing him every day when they were both busy with work. Still, he knew he would get scolded if he left her waiting. As he approached the ghostly pale figure, she seemed to spring into life, waving dramatically at him and rushing to be by his side. 

“Hey Min,” she said with a large grin, before kissing him repeatedly on the lips. At first, he was stunned, before holding her shoulders to calm her and kiss her slowly, giving her a small peck.    
  


“What are you doing here anyway?” Minseok questioned, genuinely curious. She cocked her head to the side, a flash of confusion arising in her features, before erasing it, as if it had never been there.

“I just wanted to see you!” Minseok refrained himself from asking her exasperatedly why she was here so late, instead acting as usual and allowing her to loop her arm in his own. As they took a stroll to reach his house, Ara was the one who talked about her day, which Minseok pretended to be interested in, when all he could really think about was Sea. If only there was a way for him to contact them to make sure they weren’t going to do anything rash…

“So can I stay over?” Ara jumped in front of him, their faces inches apart.   
  


“Huh?” She repeated the question, but Minseok was already shaking his head. She pouted and begged, but Minseok wouldn’t budge on the issue. After all, she had been the one who said that he could never go to her house, and to be fair, until he couldn’t go to her house, he also wouldn't allow her into his house. Even though he had nothing to hide, he still didn’t want to feel like he was the one laying all the cards in the relationship, while she could decide what she chose to show and what she didn’t. 

He reiterated that sentiment, only for her to scream loudly in the street. Scared that there may be complaints, Minseok covered her mouth, shushing her while trying to calm her down. This only seemed to make her more upset, and she pushed his gentle hands away, crying to herself before walking away. Even though Minseok knew that he should chase after her, he was so used to her tantrums leading to nothing that he had no energy to give to her. 

Having been tricked by her many times to be dissuaded into following her whims, it only led to Minseok getting hurt for always trying to mend their relationship. Yet, when he was upset, she would dismiss it as if it was nothing. So the best thing that he decided to do was simply accept her at her worst, and allow her to recover by herself, where she would be less likely to belittle him or argue with him. 

Putting his hands in his hoodie pockets, the cold night air clung to him as even the dim street lights couldn't illuminate the way properly for him. The foliage from the morning still remained permanently glued to the streets, but the soft crunches of the morning had turned into loud cracks. Honestly, the stillness of the night was spooking the black-haired man, so with determination, he forced himself to walk faster, trying not to notice that he seemed to hear other footsteps alongside his somewhere further away. By the time he finally reached his apartment building, his hands were shaking as he grabbed the keys from his pocket, almost dropping them on the floor. Unlocking the door before promptly locking it, he let out a breath of relief and walked the stairs to his floor.

Typing the code, he was greeted by his lovely furball. Needing comfort for an unusual day, he picked his baby up and cuddled Tan, the door locking itself automatically behind him. Hopefully, his day would be better tomorrow.

  
  


The next day, Minseok was at work early, preparing for his segment and warming up his vocal chords. When Sehun came to ritually greet him, he hadn’t expected for there to be an ethereal man next to him. Yes, Sehun was tall and handsome, but there was something breath-taking about the shorter brunette. His eyes seemed to have this shimmering quality that kept you entranced, and the curve of his lips at the corners showed a tendency to smile. The handsome man stuck out his hand (slender fingers reaching out to Minseok) and said,

“Hi, I’m Luhan. N-nice to meet you,” He introduced himself a bit nervously. Minseok stopped himself from ogling the man, looking down at his feet before taking the hand and shaking it briefly. He hoped that Luhan hadn’t thought he meant anything weird by staring at him so long. After all, Minseok was used to admiring beauty in the world, including the beauty of people. But he didn’t want there to be any misunderstandings about his intentions, as he honestly was staring for purely aesthetic reasons, since he would also admire bodybuilders and the like on Instagram, he convinced himself.

  
“He’s Minseok,” Sehun interrupted, knowing that Minseok would go into his more regressive state around new people. Sehun directed them into one of the meeting rooms, explaining the situation briefly to Minseok.

“He said you have important information for his case. He’s a detective, and apparently the killer revealed themselves on your show.”

Minseok’s mind flashed to Sea, still not being able to let go of everything in general about them. This change in his mood from being clueless to being more contemplative was noticed by the detective, who leaned closer to the table, also getting closer to Minseok. Sehun left them to their devices. 

Guessing that Minseok seemed to not be comfortable around strangers, Luhan gave him a pleading look and looked directly into his eyes,   
“Do you have anything we could look at? Specifically, anything to do with the person you call Sea?” Minseok tried to seem outwardly calm, but internally, he was freaking out. Not only did a hot man who was actually a detective come to his workplace, but this meant that a freaking serial killer was using him! What if they had been following him yesterday? Even worse, what if they had seen Ara walk off? A nervous sweat overtook him, and he excused himself for a few minutes. Panicked, he called Ara to no avail. He then decided to text her, but all the messages were left unchecked. Now, he was truly worried and didn’t know what to do. He went back to the table defeated, agreeing to help Luhan. 

“What do you need?” Minseok asked the detective. Luhan listed things like the original letter, as well as the envelope it came from and any future letters from that same person. Minseok had agreed to everything, from time to time fidgeting with his phone to check whether Ara had replied to him. 

'What?', she finally replied back by text, unusually cold, but Minseok's girlfriend was always doing and saying unexpected things. 

‘You’re not in any danger, right? Did you feel followed?’ As Minseok looked up from his phone, now less stressed because it seemed Ara was at least not in any immediate danger, he couldn’t disregard the perplexed look on the detective’s face, highlighted by his arched eyebrows going further up his forehead. Minseok turned his head slightly and coughed, as if to clear his throat before giving a well-needed explanation.

“It’s just that my... girlfriend wasn’t replying to me, and I wondered whether she was in danger after all that you said.” Minseok hadn’t really known why he had hesitated at mentioning Ara, since their relationship was far from being some secret. Maybe it was because there was something enchanting about Detective Luhan, but Minseok knew that whatever this was, he had to halt it because Ara was more important. Anyway, he barely knew this man!

…

Luhan, having heard that Minseok had a girlfriend, cursed slightly in his head. Why were all the good-looking guys always straight? He held back a sigh and secretly gave up any sort of romantic thoughts between him and the man with the feline features. Instead, he chose to focus more on the investigation, which was what was most pertinent.

“That’s fine, it’s completely understandable,” Luhan chuckled, but he hoped that Minseok didn’t notice that it was a bit strained, as could be heard by Luhan’s pitch shift. The brunette heard another ping from Minseok’s phone, and after checking the message quickly, the other man seemed to shake his head in an imperceptible way and completely shut off his phone. Hopefully, with no distractions, they could work more effectively. And Luhan yet again stopped his brain from saying ‘and I can stare at him for a little longer without feeling too guilty’, as every ping became a pang of realisation that they could never work out, even in Luhan’s wildest imagination. 

He coughed as a precursor to further conversation, to make sure that he had Minseok’s attention.    
“So, we obviously don’t want to alert the serial killer. What I propose is that you continue on with your show as normal for a few weeks, and maybe they’ll let more slip.” Minseok had nodded his head attentively, the bob being cute in a distracting way, before looking Luhan directly in the eyes and asking,   
“But doesn’t that mean that they will kill other people? And why announce their murders in such a strange way? Are we even sure they are a murderer?” all in one breath. Luhan’s eyes began bugging out at the sheer amount of questions that he was being bombarded with, before chuckling lightly. This seemed to deflate Minseok a little, and Luhan rushed to clarify.

“It’s just that most people aren’t so… enthusiastic about investigations like this. It usually takes a lot of time and effort, and right now, the environment around the police hasn’t been too good…” 

Luhan recalled the news report the other day on the corruptness of the police, including how several convicted persons were allowed to roam the streets because there had not been enough evidence to indict them. It was a shame, but there was little Luhan could do about it, since it went out of his hands. All he could do was catch the criminals and trust that justice would be served, and he felt like his little squad was helping somewhat. Due to the infamous corruption of the Korean police force, fewer people were becoming police officers in Korea, so foreigners needed to be employed. Even though foreigners were still disliked by the general public due to the rampant xenophobia, at least the number of rightful convictions was on the rise, which was all Luhan could ask for.

Going back to the shorter man in front of him, he realised that while lost in thought, he had been waiting patiently for Luhan to actually answer his questions. Sporting a small smile, Luhan began to describe the situation in full.

“So, we have this serial killer that acts quite sporadically. For a while, they had actually stopped killing. But recently, they started again. The police have been very cautious about revealing who they are, since they call them the ‘Heartless killer’ but no one in the media actually knows why, since we usually funnel a lot of the information, or even leave misdirecting information so that we can catch the killer off-guard. They are specifically called Heartless because they always cut a heart shape on the cheek of their victim before doing other gruesome things, such as cutting off limbs and organs. Their modus operandi other than that, is having strange calling cards. In the past, it used to be a university radio show, and now it seems it may be your own. My personal theory is that they love attention, but with how the police have been funnelling information, and for my personal satisfaction at not giving the sick individual gratification, we won’t alert them yet that we think it’s them with any news coverage... To be truthful, only I think that this Heartless killer is the person on your radio show yesterday, but I’ll always follow a lead, even if it leads to a dead-end, because it’s a possibility,” Luhan finished determinedly, fists clenching tighter than before. 

Minseok took all this in, eyes sparkling, not even uttering a single sound other than breathing. This was weird to Luhan because he was more used to people interrupting him while he theorised, since his squad tended to be loud and loved most of all being contrary. Especially Tao.

“... The reason that I’m asking you to continue with the radio show, even though more victims may be alerted, is that a) we have no clue why Heartless has come back, b) we have no leads on their whereabouts and c) why they are specifically targeting your radio show. There may be more casualties, and obviously I hate that it has to be like this, but it’s a necessary evil to stop others from being murdered, rather than floundering around with no clue where to go, since we can’t waste police resources on dead ends-”

“But didn’t you just say this was a dead-end?” Minseok finally asked. Luhan gave a small smile, secretly really enjoying how much attention Minseok paid to his words before saying,

“It’s fine, the only police resource being wasted is my extra time. But, if you're willing to cooperate, it would be a great help that just may not be a dead end.” He winked at the end of his speech, thinking it was cool and also being a habit of his around the precinct, but then quickly regretting it because he probably looked deranged and Minseok would find him strange and-

“Sure!” Minseok laughed, his eyes growing smaller as he patted Luhan’s hand. Oh God, he hadn’t realised how small Minseok’s hands were, and the gummy smile wasn’t doing anything for his sanity. Without thinking, Luhan gently grabbed Minseok’s hand, before letting it go as if singed. He stood up, firing up his seat like a bullet and then giving away his business card whilst facing the door, about ready to leave before he did something stupid like call him Minseokie as he was used to at the precinct, or even more horrifying, profess his love to Minseok. 

“Erm.. C-call me on that number if you need anything. T-there’s also the address of the precinct, see ya.” Luhan hoped that his rapid wave at the man before leaving wasn’t too weird. He felt like such a fucking idiot when talking to Minseok that he didn’t know how he could face even talking to him next time. He sighed to himself as he was at the exit, hoping that his hunch was right this time, and the quicker he could solve this case, the quicker he could stop being so close to and crushing on a clearly taken man.

…

Minseok honestly felt a bit perplexed. Luhan seemed really nice, if not maybe even more shy than he was. Sure, he had been a bit startled when the man had suddenly held his hand, but from seeing his face, he had known that it was a sincere gesture of thankfulness. Cupping his cheek to his hand, he couldn’t help but smile at the thought that not only did he know such a nice new person in his life, but he could finally kind of follow his long-lost dream of being a detective, and actually being a key part of the investigation. It was all morbidly exciting.

…

“Ge, you’re back!” A dimpled smile greeted him as he entered the office. Looking around as he gave a small nod to Yixing, he saw Tao wearing sunglasses while resting his legs on the desk in a nonchalant manner. Next to him, Jongdae was typing furiously away on his laptop, regularly checking his phone while Yifan was looking stressed at his desk, as usual. With a smirk, Luhan pulled Tao’s glasses off in a clean swoop, revealing that the younger man had been sleeping instead of working. The veins on Yifan’s temple jutted out more prominently than before as he stood up and slapped Tao’s head, causing a cry of injustice from the youngest member of their group. Luhan decided that he had enough fun and went to sit next to Yixing, who seemed to be taking his break.

“What’s up?” Luhan questioned the perpetually sleeping-looking man, who seemed even more shattered today.

“What can I say? We’re all exhausted here, the boss was panicking that you weren’t going to make it on time to stay while he goes to catch the guy, and Captain Joonmyeon also gave him a bunch more work, which he will obviously give to us, which means we won’t get to sleep well again for a while.” Yixing said all this in a very matter of fact way, before flashing a smile, which got Luhan spluttering,

“So, the same old same old.” After a moment of silence, Yixing asked,

“What were you up to anyway? You’re usually on time, since you know you’re the only one the boss can rely on.” It seemed that Luhan had quite an exciting morning, since Yixing saw his face transform into different states all at once. At first, excited and glowing, which usually meant that he had one of his magical hunches. Then hesitation, seen by the stillness in his features, before a flash of sadness was transported into and away from his eyes. Finally, he crumbled at the desk in a mess like the rest of them in (probably) agony, holding his face in his hands, which only spiked Yixing’s curiosity infinitely more.

“What the hell happened?” Yixing almost shouted, which got the attention of everyone in their group. It was quite hard to hide anything from each other, due to how close-knit they all were. This was especially true with people like Tao and Luhan, who were incredibly expressive when it came to aspects of their private life. For Luhan, it was usually in the love department (while for Tao, he was dramatic about everything). It was no surprise when Luhan went in and hugged Yixing, hiding his face in Yixing’s chest for comfort.

“I fucked up. In front of Minseokie…” They all surrounded their table like vultures, Tao, now fully awake, demanding answers. Raising his head up, but still clinging onto Yixing, he recounted with a pained strain in his voice how he had found a lead for the serial killer Heartless, who had been so elusive, and that it led to meeting Minseok, but of course, he had made a fool of himself. Unlike their usual attitude of laughing at Luhan’s shortcomings, they all patted him on the back, Jongdae even reassuring him that,   
“I’m sure you didn’t really make a fool of yourself, and if you did it doesn’t really matter since he was probably blinded by your hotness and-” which caused Jongdae to scream in pain and complain at the boss’ attack on him. As kind of a comment as it was, this only led to Luhan blurting out,   
“But he has a girlfriend!” which made him crawl back into Yixing’s chest. Yifan exhaled quietly to himself before finally stating,   
“Guys, let’s go out tonight and eat a meal together like we used to.” They all snapped their heads to look at the boss, who was usually so stingy that they had to pay for even their own lunches. Him offering was a big deal, and showed how much he really cared about them. Loudly, they all went to hug the boss and started offering restaurants and dishes they had wanted to eat. 

Before their requests could go on any longer, Captain Joonmyeon stepped in with a mildly frustrated look on his face, raising his eyebrows at the chaos of people in Team M just surrounding the man he wanted to speak with.

“What is going on here?” he demanded loudly, which stopped the babble in an instant as they all seemed to retreat back to their stations. Being tired of reprimanding Team M, simply because they were the best unit in the precinct, he cocked his head in the direction of his office as he glared at Yifan. Passing by all the stacks of paperwork in people’s cluttered desks to reach his closed-off abode, he sat down on his side of the desk before gesturing for Yifan to sit down.

“Kris-”

“Please, call me Yifan. You know I don’t use that name in Korea.” Joonmyeon rolled his eyes at that, knowing that their past was locked with those four letters. 

“Yifan,” he stressed, which only caused a sly smile to creep in the other man’s features.

“Yes dear?”   
  


“Stop messing around and acting so smug!” Joonmyeon snarled while banging the desk, causing Yifan to jump a bit. Even though he was a small man, the Captain could truly be scary. He cleared his throat before continuing. “So, we will be going to catch the Smiler today at 3 PM with Officer Kyungsoo’s team, which has ten people. We will all be carrying guns and obviously, we will be-”   
  


“Joonmyeon” Yifan interrupted. But the other male just continued on.

“Carrying guns, but please don’t shoot the guy, and especially don’t kill the guy if you can help it-

“Joonmyeon,” Yifan tried again.

“Because the last time you-”

“Joonmyeon! What’s wrong?... You’d never tell me something so basic as procedure,” he said softly, going to grab and hold the trembling hands of the Captain. Even though Joonmyeon had appeared fine, Yifan had noticed the way his lips had been frozen, as if in fear. Seeing that the Captain was being unresponsive, Yifan stood up and went to the other side of the desk, bringing him up and hugging the shorter man tightly, like he used to.

No tears came out of him, but his voice took on a shaky quality as he rambled on,

“Kris, I’m scared. I’m so scared. He…” A sigh. “He’s the one who killed my brother… I knew that I would take revenge but… it feels so surreal now. Actually bringing him in. But, but what if they don’t find him guilty? E-everyone knows the police here is so fucking corrupt that I wouldn’t be surprised if he got away with it and-”

“Joonmyeon. You know I won’t let that fucker get away with it. I’ll kill him myself it I have to,” but this only elicited Joonmyeon shaking his head in distress, not wanting Yifan to go so far for him. Yet, it somehow caused a smile to appear on the Captain’s face, followed by silent streaks of tears. When they looked at each other- really looked at each other- it seemed inevitable that Yifan lowered himself and kissed Joonmyeon quietly on the lips, eyes closed. It only lingered for a few seconds, neither pressing forward or applying any added pressure, and when Yifan pulled back, he felt like he had made a mistake. Instead of being allowed to regret what he had done, a creaking noise from the door signalled that someone was entering, and his arms which had been draped on the Captain’s waist were quickly removed, instead being occupied with rubbing his lips. A rookie officer, Jongin, smiled politely and stated that Kyungsoo said his team were ready, and that they were just waiting on them. Opting to not discuss whatever _that_ had been, Yifan left with Jongin, giving a small bow to the Captain before walking away. It seemed that Yifan hadn’t realised the way the Captain had licked his lips and touched them afterwards, wanting the taste to linger a bit more…

…

It has been a few days since meeting the handsome detective and Minseok still hadn’t been able to give the letter to him, or even call him. He didn’t know why, but he felt like if he got more involved with Luhan, something would fundamentally change or be revealed about him that he may have been suppressing for a while, and he didn’t think he had the courage to let it come out yet. 

Today he was going on a date with Ara, but she was also bringing along her friend from university, Myungsoo. At first, it had been weird not because he was a guy who was super close to his girlfriend, but because it was a date. As in, a moment of romance shared between two people. But like always, what he wanted usually didn’t matter, and Myungsoo and Ara usually boisterously chatted away as he quietly drank and ate, choosing instead to enjoy the scenery from the window. By this point, any feelings of jealousy were non-existent not because he didn’t see Myungsoo as a threat, but because he would be a permanent fixture in their relationship no matter what he would say. 

As he went to the streets to hail a taxi, he gave the address to the taxi driver, closing his eyes along the ride at the familiar journey. Once there, he paid and left, standing in front of the Lovely Store, which was a pretty pricey restaurant. Still, as he took the window seat, the glass displayed an almost magical scene of snow droplets delicately dancing and evaporating outside, fairy lights making the whole experience more special. As he smiled contentedly to himself, he heard a loud “Min!” from the other side of the room, seeing Ara arrive with the man in question. Myungsoo had changed slightly, now sporting a scruffy beard and grey glasses, which were dotted with water droplets from the light snowfall. They both took off their outerwear and went to hug Minseok, Myungsoo towering over him. They sat down and made light conversation.

“So, you’re finally becoming a professor, right?” Minseok directed at the tall man, who nodded with a small smile. The conversation between the two went stale after that (like always), being only remedied by the food that Minseok had ordered beforehand coming to the table. 

Since knowing each other for half a year, it was strange how in sync Minseok had become with the odd pair, especially during these dates. He would always be the only one on time, so he would look out of the window until they both came together. To not waste time, he would order first, since they always ordered the exact same meal. For Ara, a small bowl of spaghetti and water (“because I’m on a diet”) and Myungsoo would eat a steak, rare, with a glass of wine. Sehun always warned him that it wasn’t normal, but he had heard that people in a relationship make sacrifices for each other. Like his mum did for his dad (by moving away from her family to be with him) so he too could do such a simple sacrifice. After all, even though it was early days, it seemed like they would naturally get married. He wasn’t getting any younger, and he didn’t know if he could find true love like his parents. 

“-Right?” Ara beamed happily in his direction.

“Huh? Sorry, what did you say?” Minseok asked, not usually involved in their conversations. Ara rolled her eyes at Myungsoo as if there was an inside joke that he was missing out on before saying,

“Min, Soo said that he’s been awarded as the most talented doctor in surgery at his university. Isn’t that so impressive? Do you know, I helped him? Yah, you should be so grateful to me!” Ara turned back to Myungsoo, Minseok forgotten once again. 

“I get the credit on that certificate, not you, so stop complaining!” Myungsoo howled, his voice loud as he was now inebriated. Minseok tried to ask ‘how did you help him?’ since to his knowledge, Ara had nothing to do with medicine or surgery, as she currently had an office job. But something caught his eye by the window, which was Luhan with a man next to him, smiling at each other. He must have been staring too long, because Luhan turned around and saw that it was none other than the RJ there with two other people. When they met each other’s eyes, Luhan waved gleefully before seeming to quickly disappear, followed by the guy.

The next time they were in sight was right in front of him. Luhan panting a bit under his breath.

“Uh.. hi?” Minseok greeted, not really sure how to approach the situation. The guy next to Luhan spoke in what seemed to be Mandarin. Even though Minseok was not an expert, he had learned a bit of Mandarin because of Ara, who had gone there for most of her education. He said ‘Ge, what are we doing here? I know I said you you’re not a fool but this is stupid! How can you-’ which was interrupted by Luhan with a simple ‘Shut up!’.

“Hi, Minseok! Sorry for coming in, I realise it’s a bit weird now, but I had something I actually wanted to talk to you about.”

“Min, who is this man?” Ara asked with a smile on her face, but he could see from her gritted teeth that she was not happy. Luhan extended his hand at the seated Myungsoo and Ara, who briefly shook his hand. The other man was still talking in Mandarin about leaving, but Luhan steadily ignored him.

“Sorry to interrupt your date, but I just wanted to talk to my friend Minseok,” Luhan commented, directing it at Myungsoo and Ara as if they were the couple “My name is Luhan by the way, nice to meet you. And my friend over here is Yixing.” Minseok had a plethora of thoughts running through his head. Relief that Yixing was just a friend, it seemed. Confusion that Luhan was here, and that he was pretending to be a friend rather than a detective and barely an acquaintance at this point.

“Actually, Ara is my girlfriend, and Myungsoo is her school friend,” Minseok clarified awkwardly, a red flush appearing on his cheek. Obviously it seemed like he was third-wheeling to anyone watching because even proximity wise, Ara was much closer to Myungsoo. He still felt a bit embarrassed, but he wanted to get rid of the tension by moving further away from the two with Luhan, grabbing his arm and pulling him in a corner of the restaurant as his friend stayed behind at the table.

“Luhan, what are you doing here?” Minseok whispered fervently, still holding onto Luhan’s arm but with much less force.

“Sorry.. I-I saw you and I remembered that I had wanted to tell you to keep the investigation secret, even from loved ones. No one should know my actual relation to you, or that you know about the possible nature of the letters, since the killer could be someone close to you… or not.”

“Huh?” Minseok uttered, his mind spinning. Luhan grabbed both his shoulders before continuing, getting closer so that he could hear him clearly over the babble of people at the restaurant. 

“I said, we need to be careful. I may be wrong, but my friend Yixing is a profiler, and he thinks the killer seems to work through people they are close to. So the person may be close to you, since there would be little other reason to use your radio show.” 

This seemed to only shake Minseok even more, making Luhan internally panic. Oh geez, he had done it again. What could he do? What could he do to alleviate the worry? The only thing he could think of was hugging him, like his friends usually did. Luhan pulled Minseok in a tight hug and made sure to caress Minseok’s back as he whispered comforting words like,

“You’re fine. You’ll be okay. I’ll protect you.” 

This seemed to have its desired effect, as Minseok melted into his arms, holding onto him more tightly as he had been too stunned at first to actually do anything in the embrace. Minseok’s small hands bunched up on Luhan’s newly pressed shirt, but as the breaths he exhaled went from frantic to calm, Luhan didn’t mind. As he continued with his ministrations, his eyes caught those of Ara, the supposed girlfriend who he had confused as the girlfriend of the other man. 

Truthfully, the only reason Luhan had come in was to save Minseok from the boredom he had witnessed from the window (although he thought that he had been stuck as a third wheel rather than at his own date). Luhan felt so stupid thinking that the girl wasn’t his girlfriend before, because now she was glaring at him with fire in her eyes. Even though he felt like being defiant, Luhan felt that he had been hugging the man maybe too long to be seen as friendly, so he detached himself from Minseok, cupping his cheek to ask him if he was okay now. He couldn't help swiping his thumb gently over his cheek, which reminded him of baozi he used to eat gluttonously back in high school, and Minseok seemed to also lean into the touch for a fraction of a second before pulling away, and saying he was fine. Grabbing his neck, Luhan excused himself, Yixing soon after following him and bowing to Minseok.

...

Minseok’s heart was pounding loudly in his ears as the other man had held him. At first, it was because of the fear. Fear that one of his friends or family were related to or were the serial killer. What if it was his sister? Maybe Baekhyun? Or maybe even Myungsoo? He didn’t think he could look at anyone without suspecting them of being involved in some way. But as he heard the silent whispers Luhan had chanted in his ear, the harsh beating hadn’t stopped. It had only gotten louder, making Minseok redder than he had ever been in his life. Even the palm on his face had been electric, every single swipe making him want more. But these feelings weren’t normal. 

No. He had to reject whatever was happening to him.

Minseok dismissed it as it simply being adrenaline mixed in with Luhan being handsome, so of course he would be flustered by him. He rushed to sit back with Myungsoo and Ara, intent on listening in to their mundane talk to get the erratic thoughts out of his head.

…

“Luhan, what the hell? I told you not to tell him that the killer could be someone who was near him. Not only are you breaking protocol, but I told you that he could be the killer, so he would know the police are getting close to him.”

  
“As if Minseok could be the killer! Look at him- he was terrified when I told him!”

“Exactly my point you fucking idiot! If he knows, he’s going to become more paranoid about the people around him, and he won’t act normal, which may cause them to know we are onto them. If you would just think for once, instead of rushing in, then this wouldn’t happen!” Yixing shouted exasperatedly in Mandarin as they were power walking to the restaurant Jongdae recommended to them, since he had decided to waste so much time with Minseok for no reason other than to cause a mess.

“Admittedly, I messed up,”

“No shit, Sherlock,”

“But!” Luhan shouted pointing a conspiratorial finger in the air,” It may also cause Heartless to come out if they are more panicked.”

“Oh here we go again….” Yixing muttered under his breath, which Luhan ignored. 

The two best friends had known each other for around 5 years now. Surprisingly, it wasn’t because they met in school or anything like that, but because they had both met each other at a gay bar in Changsa. For Luhan, after staying in the closet for years, had never actually been with a real guy. Sure, he had a few internet relationships with guys, but he hadn’t even had a first kiss with a guy. The only people he had kissed were women (unwillingly) who he had been paired with in university for games like Truth or Dare and 7 Minutes in Heaven, which had just reconfirmed that he wasn’t interested in girls. 

Going to his first gay bar had been tricky, because even though he lived alone, his parents were still perpetually worried about him and had even hired a bodyguard to follow him at a distance. So to throw him off, he had swapped clothes with a random person in the bathroom, buying off their silence before rushing away to live out his fantasy. Being quite nervous around new people, he hadn’t really expected guys approaching him and buying him drinks, wanting his attention. But Luhan could only stutter and mutter into the shot glass before drinking himself away, not really vibing with anyone there. 

It was later in the night that he saw Yixing, after being exhausted from dancing. He had been a bartender at the time, and apparently very concerned with him as he gave him iced water while saying,

“Here, it’s on the house.” Luhan had drank it thankfully, the water clearing his head from the muddy mess that it had been. He quickly thanked the man, wondering why he had been so nice to him.

“Are you also gay?” Luhan shouted over the loud music, slurring his words a bit as he was still intoxicated. Yixing had been making a cocktail for another person, performing tricks with the cocktail shaker that had the audience entertained.

“Kind of, but not really…” Yixing answered as he served the other man, before facing Luhan fully.

“What does that mean?” Luhan said with a really wrinkled brow that made his pretty face not so pretty. With a glimpse of a dimple, Yixing continued,

“Well, I’m pansexual, but I do usually have a tendency for guys. Especially guys like you… Oh by the way, my name is Yixing.”

“Luhan,” he replied as he extended his hand out to the bartender, his brain slowly processing that maybe he was hitting on him. He took another swing of his water before saying, “Is that why you gave me water? Because I’m your type?” Yixing chuckled at that.

“No. It’s because like your name, you looked like a deer in the headlights. I think I would feel personally responsible if someone took you away and had their way with you- or worse!” Yixing said with a mock shocked face, raising his hands to his cheeks in a cartoonish way, which only served to make Luhan laugh.

They had talked a bit more, laughed a lot more, and when Yixing’s shift had finished, kissed a lot more. Even though Luhan didn’t remember much of the night even to this day, he was pretty sure that he and Yixing had sex that night, which would have been his first time. 

As a romantic person, Luhan thought that they would date after, but Yixing was a more friends with benefits type of person. So they stayed in that grey area for a few months, before finally settling on simply being best friends. No one else knew that they had been anything more than friends, since they acted so stupidly around one another. But there was a reason why Yixing knew so much. Every time after sex, Luhan would reveal a secret about himself, selfishly hoping that it would tie down Yixing. 

The last time they slept together, and he knew that the ending of the relationship was inevitable and soon to be, Luhan had decided to drop a bomb on Yixing- that he was clinically depressed.

They had lied in bed together, Luhan spooning Yixing from behind as per habit. He knew that Yixing would utter something like “let’s stop this and stay friends,” but he had to cling on to the other man. So he blurted out,

“By the way, I have depression. I have to take pills three times a day to help with my serotonin levels. That’s why sometimes I have good days, others I have bad days. Everyone thinks I should stop acting so fucking priviledged and their lives are much shittier compared to mine. Calling me a rich snob with nothing better to do. But I can’t get rid of this… emptiness. Some days, I’m better at hiding it than other days. Make it until you fake it, right?” Luhan laughed, but it was a sad laugh.

“I’ve… wanted to die. I never acted on it, but I have thought about it. Constantly, actually. I do think I’m getting a bit better, but if you leave, that would break me and-”

“Luhan, let’s stop this.”

Luhan’s world shattered. The words in the air lingered and roamed like poison, filling his lungs with charcoal and black, and he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to think of anything but the rejection. Yixing had already turned by now in Luhan’s limp arms, and began hugging Luhan tightly.

“Ge… You know that you and me can never work out. I’m not looking for a relationship right now, but you are. But I think we can be good friends. Best friends. I won’t leave you.”

“B-but you won’t want to be with me anymore if it’s not for sex..” Luhan cried. 

“Contrary to your terrible opinion of me, I actually love my friends a lot, even more so than one-night stands. If you’ll have me, I’ll stay by your side and protect you. From the world, from yourself. Just… You don’t have to always shut me out... And find someone who is better for you romantically than I am.” Yixing said all while stroking Luhan’s hair softly, letting the other man cry as he wanted to do.

“By the way, you were a crap boyfriend, but great in bed. I bet you’ll miss my dick,” Luhan cried wetly on Yixing’s shoulder, giving assurances that Luhan was an excellent partner in bed as they fell asleep like that, in each other’s arms. 

And Yixing had kept his promise, even after all this time. Always staying by his side.

More pertinently, always scolding him for his bad decisions.

“Look, if we get Heartless to slip up and leave a trace, unlike themselves, we’ll have solved the biggest mystery of our police careers!” Luhan finished as they entered the Thai restaurant. Yixing still protested as they took their seats with Team M, and then noticed that their leader wasn’t there yet. 

“Where’s Yifan?” The dimpled man asked, only to be met with silence and shrugs by his peers. He looked down at the table only to see it empty. It seemed like they didn’t want to risk ordering any food before their boss came, or else they may have to pay for it. While it was unfortunate, it did sometimes happen because Yifan was the busiest out of all of them, even though he acted so cool (when he wasn’t frustrated by Joonmyeon) that he always appeared on top of things, even if he was suffering. 

“Ahh I’m so hungry! Luhan ge, you should buy the food since your family is rich!” Tao complained, as always.

“Hey, I told you I’m living independently! I’m making even less money than you, but if you didn’t pay for those expensive designer clothes and bags, maybe you could pay!” Luhan retaliated back, causing more bickering with the duo. Just as Yixing was going to send a distress signal message to Yifan, he turned up, looking a bit ruffled, but still dressed to the nines.

“Hey guys, sorry for being late.” He huffed as he sat down at their table. Being met by silence was unusual for their little group, so he looked at all of them before asking them, “What?”

They all looked quietly at their table, freaking Yifan out before Jongdae broke the awkward silence by asking in a way that made Yifan suspicious,

“So.. Boss. How’s your day been?”

“Oh, well good. No- great, actually. We finally caught the Smiler and-”

“Umm.. Yifan ge, I don’t think he’s talking about that,” Tao snickered as he pointed an index finger to his neck, which was what they had all been looking at from the moment he entered. Like, it was so incredibly obvious and for their boss to take time out of his busy schedule to get a massive hickey like that, it was really something else. 

Unexpectedly, their boss flushed rose before buttoning his previously open collar as much as possible, which only partially hid the love mark.

“Boss, why don’t you tell us the hot goss? Who’s it from? An older lady friend?” Jongdae questioned, whining when Yifan at first dismissed his answers, before actively ignoring him. Instead, he chose to order all the food they wanted, which was ample distraction from the purple mark on his neck. 

As they ate and talked, Jongdae, the gossiper of the group asked,

“So what were you guys also late for? Were you two.. You know?”

“Know what?” Tao asked sleepily as he was taking pictures of the meal, which he would later show off on his Instagram.

The two men in question looked at each other, before turning back to Jongdae, Luhan drinking his water as Jongdae whispered conspiratorially,

“Fucking?” This led to a spray of water landing directly on Yifan in the circular table, who had been sitting opposite to Luhan. Tao screamed in grief, saying things like “Eww disgusting” and “Really??” as Yifan complained about his suit as well as wanting to know how Jongdae could even think of such a ridiculous idea.

“No offence guys, but even though I hack for a living, it wasn’t very hard to get this information. Not with the things you used to post on social media, coupled with how on a drinking night you, Yixing, just gave up your phone to me. And what can I say, curiosity may have killed the cat, but it was a muuch more informed cat than before.” All the while, Luhan and Yixing were telling Jongdae to stop talking and to keep quiet, but the sly smile never left his face as his lips curled up in glee.

  
  


“What was one of the text messages I read when I scrolled way up past your nonsensical conversations?... Oh! I remember. ‘I’m pent up so bad, I need you now,”

“Eww, not in front of me, I’m the baby of the group! Spare me! I’ll have nightmares!” Tao complained, and this time, no one had the thought of saying their usual Team M catchphrase of ‘Shut up Tao’ because the discovery was way too shocking. 

“Excuse me?” A waitress, who was right behind Yifan said. “I’m sorry, but if you continue with the volume, we may have to kick you out.” she said with an annoyed furrow on her brow. Yifan apologised for them all, like he usually did, dissuading her with his cool charm as the others revelled in the discovery, trying to be quieter. When she left, a happy glint crossed Tao’s eyes as he whispered in Luhan’s ear,

“I am so using this as blackmail material,” which caused more bickering throughout the night. 

Eventually, they got kicked out, but at least they had the take away food, so they chose to eat by the sidewalk. It was comical- five handsome men dressed in fancy suits on the sidewalk eating Thai food loudly. As they quietened down, Luhan explained,

“Look, guys. We had a weird relationship for a while, but we were looking for different things. Now, we’re just happy to be best friends. Okay?” They all seemed to understand that Luhan didn’t really want to joke about it, Jongdae putting his arm around Luhan’s shoulder and saying, “Sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything” in a solemn tone. Yixing shook his head, replying, “I’m sure we would’ve been eventually found out. It’s not like we took any great pains in hiding it, and it was fun while it lasted.” As he continued stuffing his mouth, even Yifan spoke up.

“If you guys have secrets you were hiding,well… I have one too. I slept with Joonmyeon today.” A collective WHAT emanated from the four men, now truly surprised by the night. He sighed before continuing.

“Yeah… we used to have a thing back in Canada for a few years… He was the love of my life… But then life got in the way and he wouldn’t talk to me, so I left my English name behind and took on this Chinese one- Yifan. But when we met at the precinct, almost a year back, I didn’t know whether to feel lucky or doomed. My Korean wasn’t great so when you” he said while glaring at Jongdae fondly, ”told me ‘senior’ was ‘dear’, I fell for it, but it also reminded me of our past once I truly knew it’s meaning. Even though he was harsh to me, I still felt something that I didn’t want to let go, even after all these years, and I finally know now why he wouldn’t speak to me then. So.. I want it to work out. I want to marry him.”

The confession made a few gasps fly in the wind.

“Holy shit, I’m actually a matchmaker. Not only did I get Yifan and the Captain together again with my joke, but I found out Yixing and Luhan were together.”

“Noo!” Luhan quickly refuted that, quickly explaining that he had a lead, and that until he was completely sure, he would keep quiet about it other than the fact that he was working with Minseok, the RJ they listened to at lunchtimes. 

Tao wolf-whistled, eating a bite of his food before saying,

“See Jongdae? I’m the actual matchmaker. Who knew I would get Luhan close to Minseokie hyung by introducing them together by radio?” he sighed in a dreamy manner.

“Yeah right,” Yifan shoved him lightly with his elbow. But this time, there was no whining, just a large grin. A grin that spread to all their faces. Even though Luhan knew he didn’t really have a chance with Minseok, like the others thought, he still wanted to at least pursue a friendship with him.

Yet, Luhan couldn’t forget the pretty pink flush Minseok had when he had been caressing his cheek, as if intoxicated by… him.

  
  


…

It had been a few days since meeting Luhan at the restaurant, and Minseok went to work looking more haggard than usual. Even though his clothes were neat as he wore a jean jacket with a plain shirt underneath and dark trousers, he had prominent eye bags under his eyes, probably due to the lack of sleep. It was Sehun’s day off, so Minseok wasn’t greeted by anyone until he sat down, and Chanyeol came to sit with him on the couch.

“Hey hyung. No offence… but you look like shit.” Chanyeol commented while handing his half-drunk coffee cup to Minseok with a full-toothed grin, who gratefully sipped on it.

“Yeah, well I feel like it too,” Minseok replied back, closing his eyes and rubbing them together with his digits.

He really wished he could stay oblivious to his surroundings, and act normally, but it was proving to be a difficult task. It took a lot of effort for Minseok to trust people, so hearing that someone near him could be betraying his trust was even more so heartbreaking for him. He knew that it was only one of the possibilities, but Minseok knew that this was one of the big reasons that he couldn’t become a detective. As a detective, you have to suss out the lies that people string every day. But with his current job, he dealt with only the truth. The deepest, most beautiful or painful truths from the heart which helped to liberate the person sending them in some way. So yes, he didn’t know what to do really as he was even being more distant with Ara, which had made her so annoyed that she had stopped coming to pick him up from work. 

Chanyeol extended his long limbs and pulled Minseok closer, allowing him to rest on the crook of his neck, in which Minseok found comfort in listening to the rhythmic heartbeat of the larger man. They stayed like that for a while, calmness, which had felt so foreign, now actually residing in his soul. Baekhyun came in talking happily to Seulgi before noticing his two friends huddled up together. Waving Seulgi goodbye, he made sure to take the other empty space near Minseok and engulfed his waist. 

“Guys..” Minseok said quietly, half grateful and half suffocated. No matter what, he felt it in his bones that they could have nothing to do with the person who Luhan called Heartless. After all, they were the most loving and good people he knew, or he wouldn’t have been their friends for so long. Not only did they help him come out of his shell (along with Sehun), but they always did everything in their power to make him happy. 

Checking his watch in the mess of limbs, he saw that he was up next. He quickly kissed their heads as thanks before going to his booth, which was unusual because Minseok was not one for skinship, unlike them. This led to the men smiling happily towards each other while Minseok walked away. 

  
  


Today, he had a smaller stack of letters than usual, and on top of the stack was a post-it note.

‘I saw that you’ve been a bit under the weather, and I know this investigation is tough. But hang in there hyung, you know we all love you. Don’t work too hard. - Sehun’. Minseok’s cheeks became rounder as he delicately put the post-it note on his desk, a reminder that his friends were what kept him alive and sane. He wouldn’t ever suspect them again of any wrongdoing, because their hearts were far too generous to do something as horrible as murder. 

So, as usual, he was queued in, his smile a bit plastic, but at least it would compensate for his lack of joyous mood as his mind was still plagued by worry.

He went on with his list until he saw that there was another letter that was typed. He dropped the letter on the desk in a moment of weakness, before attempting to regain his strength as he looked at the camera lens with a look of assurance. 

“Let’s see… This time, the letter is named, and the recipient is…” Minseok could say nothing. How could he, when right there was his name in clear lettering. He made excuses in his brain, such as ‘my name is so common, there’s literally a guy next door with my name’ and ‘maybe it’s not Heartless’. He shook his head, gripped the letter tighter, and got a hold of himself. Luhan had told him to act normal. He couldn’t let the killer suspect anything, no matter who they were. So he read as usual, pausing a bit along the way due to the immense nervousness he was trying to hide. 

“The recipient is.. Me!” He pitched with fake excitement. “Or maybe not, since I’m sure you have at least one friend with your humble cupid’s name. The letter begins by saying:

‘Hey, guess who it is? It’s me, Sea. Thanks for the name, by the way. I quite like it, much better than another nickname I have which makes me seem mean. Oh, how I love you for being so considerate of me, Kim Minseok. Worrying about whether I’m ok, whether my love is obsessive. Well.. I guess you were right. My love was obsessive, so I moved on to another person. Oh how sweet their body was. Every limb was absolute perfection. Their small face, which I cupped in my hands like a small trophy. Their abs, like chocolate, which I caressed at night. Their teeth-... Oh! I should stop there, before I reveal too much. Maybe I should fall for someone like you, Minseokie. That’s your nickname, right? How sweet you are. How cute you are. Maybe I should-” 

A pause from Minseok, throat now dry,

“Go after you next!’” The letter ending, Minseok’s anxiety only spiking. But he had to pretend. Yes, pretend that everything was fine.

“Well Sea… I don’t know what to say! I’m literally speechless. You have… such a way with words. And I’m flattered that you seem to like me, but I’ve got a girlfriend,” Minseok joked, although he felt much more like crying in a quiet room. “And the song you want to play is… Ava Dore by Smashing Pumpkins!”

Again, Minseok played the song as usual, although he didn’t have it in him to dance along to it. Not when the line in the letter about ‘teeth’ made him focus on the lyrics of ‘I’ll pull your crooked teeth’ circling again and again in his mind. Having enough of this, Minseok slammed the pause button, smiled at the camera and said,

“Wow, that song _reeally_ isn’t my style. I know I usually play all of it, but I’ve got a little emergency. My friend is in the ER and my mind’s been a mess, and that’s not fair to any of you loyal listeners and viewers, as my personal emotions have been affecting my letter reading today… I will be better by tomorrow, but thank you and rest well guys. Bye!” He said as he stuffed the letter by Sea, or Heartless, in his back pocket discreetly and walked out and took his bag, Seulgi so surprised that she turned off the stream well after the seat was left empty.

There was only one place Minseok was going to, and it was in the address that he had hidden in his wallet for a while. It was a short cab ride there, and when he entered, the bustle of noise didn’t surprise him. A short, heart-shape- lipped man in uniform approached him, asking,

“What’s wrong civilian? Is there anything I can help you with?”

“Yes actually, Officer..” he glanced at the name tag, “Kyungsoo. I’m actually looking for a detective who works here, his name is Luhan.” He managed to let out, his expression glass compared to the turmoil inside him. Officer Kyungsoo led the way, seeming a bit startled by the fact that anyone would call for Luhan since he was in Team M, who had the least amount of external interaction. 

When he entered, he gave a quick bow to Kyungsoo and scanned the room, seeing Luhan leaning in front of what appeared to be Yixing’s desk. He was laughing happily at the other man, their faces only inches apart. It seemed to cause a strange new twinge in his already chaotic mindset, that unnaturally, he just screamed out,

“Luhan!” The detective twisted his head so hard that it seemed he had almost gotten whiplash. All the other members of the room seemed to be looking at him strangely, as if he was some sort of ghost. He dismissed their stares as Luhan bounded toward him.

“H-hey, I didn’t expect you would come here like, ever,”

“Well, I didn’t either until I got this.” He pushed the letters to Luhan, the detective reading the most recent one. After a quick read, his eyes turned completely serious. Luhan then walked to the table of a really tall and tanned man with deep eye bags and banged the letter on the table, saying,

“Tao, get me info on everything you can about this letter, and the other one too. Fingerprints, obviously isolating mine and Minseok’s. The type of printer and ink it can come from. Maybe even other foreign substances. I smell a hint of perfume on it, which could lead somewhere.” As he commanded, the other person, Tao, seemed to take all that in and said,

“I’ll take this to forensics and see what they can find, and I’ll also conduct my own investigation.” 

“Good, Jongdae, help Tao in any way you can. Also, if he does find out what model of printer it came from, could you try to find how many were sold and to who, specifically? They must have credit card information, and even if that leads to nothing, at least we can know which area they printed this from.”

“Oh Luhan, how severely you underestimate me,” The man, Jongdae, snickered before walking out with Tao to another room. Luhan then went next to Yixing, who Minseok couldn’t forget, no matter how hard he wanted to and said,

“Xing, please tell me what you can deduce from this.” Luhan then recited the letter, word for word, with the correct pauses and all. Minseok stood there, impressed by Luhan’s absolute efficiency and memory.

“Well… from what I see, the murder must either be a gay man or a woman.”

“How?” Minseok interjected, getting closer to his desk. Yixing looked up at him strangely, as if he was speaking a foreign language. Then, Minseok realised that he actually was speaking a foreign language, since to his understanding, he had only heard all these men speak in Mandarin. He coughed before speaking again, hoping that his Mandarin was up to scratch, since Ara had forced him to learn it rigorously at one point before she got annoyed by his slowness, and gave up. Even though she had given up on him, he had still decided to pursue it because it may open up avenues, like now.

“Well,” Minseok started, Luhan’s head once again turning to face him as his mouth hung open, “in the letter, they don’t actually use any pronouns. And sure, they talk about abs, but now a lot of women are pretty sporty, and do get abs. Also, with the previous letter, it was also pretty ambiguous.” Minseok finished, Yixing’s teeth being on full display not going unnoticed.

“Wait, you know Mand-” Luhan started.

“That’s not important right now, Lu. And while you are right, you’re also wrong.” Yixing said in Korean with a little tut, making Minseok deflate a bit. He went up to a wall and pulled down a whiteboard, taking a stray marker pen before writing as he explained.

“Let’s begin with the victims. We found the body of the last victim thanks to your letter. They were male, and quite handsome too with typical features like the small face and the long body. They were also found having some limbs dismembered. I don’t know if Luhan told you, but one in five of the victims were female.”

“So that means that the murderer may be bisexual?”

“Or.. that they have a preference for male victims, but that they need the female victims for some reason too… After all,” he drew a heart, ”The female victims of Heartless never had a heart on their cheek. They did, however, have one on their sleeve. That means that Heartless wanted to make a distinction between the female victims and the male ones. Why?”

“Because the hunt meant something different to them for men than it did for women?” Yixing turned to Minseok from the board and gave a pleased sound before continuing.

“Exactly, and if we look at the brutal way the murders occur, the murderer seems to be quite strong. But this heavily contrasts the way in which they write these letters- it’s sentimental, raw and pure in a sick sort of way. Yet, so far, the letters have only been written about men-”

Yixing was interrupted by a radio call on Luhan’s handheld receiver, and he excused himself as he walked away. Yixing went on explaining to Minseok, there being a look shared of what Minseok hoped was .. acceptance?

“So, If we surmise that Heartless’ preferences are men, but that they find it necessary to kill some women, although not as frequently, what does this say about our elusive serial killer?”

“Maybe… that they are two people?” Minseok thought out loud, before covering his mouth as if surprised by his own answer. A light passed Yixing’s eyes as he wrote the possibility down on the now full board. As he held his chin in contemplation, he chanted,

“Two letters. Probably two murders, and probably of two men. Like previously, there is a heart-shaped hole on their cheek. They are now not killing only indoors, in their victim’s apartment. Why were the rooms always so messy? Because maybe they were experimenting... But the one writing the letters doesn’t mention that, only love, so,” Yixing pointed at the suggestion Minseok offered again,

“Two murderers. It makes so much sense! No wonder my profiling was all over the place. I thought it was a man at first, but then it became a woman, then I thought it was a bisexual murderer, but their behaviour doesn’t seem tempted by love. Ante-mortem, the death was quite slow and painful for men, as the cut of the heart would be done first, and then they would get stabbed so slowly and deeply that their actual death would be from blood loss rather than wounds or blunt force. For women, the deaths were always quick, showing no real motivation to murder them, Then, post-mortem, the murderer seemed to act oddly by dissecting the human in such an analytical way....”

His rambling, coupled with a huge smile of revelation was halted by Luhan coming back to them with a frown on his face.

“It seems they’ve found the body of the person in our newest letter. It’s a male, around the same age as the one before. He had a cut on his cheek in the shape of the heart, but that’s not all… His head was cut off and… his teeth were pulled out, for some reason.” 

Minseok remembered the letter, and even though he held his hand to his mouth, he couldn’t help the vomit from coming out.

…

Minseok was in the precinct’s bathroom, definitely empty of the mediocre breakfast he had. Luhan had been there, rubbing his back gently as Minseok had cried, saying sorry for vomiting on the floor repeatedly. When he was done, Luhan helped him to reach the sink to wash his mouth.

“Was it.. Anything I said?” Luhan asked cautiously.

“Erm.. Yeah. I just remembered the lyrics to the song and the letter… I had.. And this is stupid - I actually hoped that Sea wasn’t actually Heartless. I hoped it was just some weird prank because there are weirdos sometimes on the show. Maybe they even liked impersonating murderers? But this is.. Real. And they may go after m-” Minseok held his mouth again with both hands, the thought making him want to puke again, but his stomach was literally too empty. 

Even in his disgusting state, Luhan held onto him closely. Today, the detective smelled like something sweet, like hydrangeas. It was comforting, and much better than the smell of his own sick, so he breathed it in, the man once again having a calming presence on him. Even when the handheld receiver babbled on, Luhan still clung to him in silence, not leaving him until he had reassured him that he would be okay. Luhan then explained that he would dispatch a surveillance team near Minseok, since it seemed like Heartless was directly choosing to target him, which did comfort Minseok slightly.

As a favour, to help the distressed man, Luhan offered Minseok a ride home, which he gratefully accepted. Before Minseok went into the detective’s car, Luhan excused himself and took out all the files that were cluttering the passenger seat at the front of the car, choosing to move them to the back seats, which were even more cluttered.

“Wow, I didn’t expect your car to be so..”

“Messy? Yeah, I don’t really get that a lot, since you’re one of the only people I’ll ever allow in my car.”

“So I’m special?” Minseok said softly, not really meaning anything by it, but the smile that Luhan gave back to him made it seem like something. 

“Yeah. I guess you are,” the brunette laughed, his face contorting into something that Minseok wouldn’t exactly consider handsome, but it still brought a big smile to his face. As he sat in the car, and Luhan drove, they began talking about hobbies, including sports, and he found out that Luhan was just as an avid fan of football as he was.

“You know, I used to be the best striker in Shanghai in high school!” Luhan bragged at the red light.

“No way! I don’t believe you” Minseok laughed, covering his mouth.

“I really was! I’ll show you my skills one day, unless you’re scared! The football scene missed me at my glory, but I knew my calling was to be a detective,” Luhan recounted with a nostalgic air, placing his hand on Minseok’s thigh. While that probably felt natural to Luhan, Minseok felt a little spike of electricity again from his touch, smile now gone as he stared at Luhan deeply. Luhan seemed to realise what he had done and quickly removed his hand, starting the car again once he realised that others behind him were honking at him to move along as the light was beaming green. 

He raised his hand outside the window as a way to signal sorry, and then actually said the words.

“Huh? The drivers wouldn’t be able to hear you.” Minseok said confusedly.

“I.. I was saying sorry to you. I’m sorry. I know I can be- I can be very, very touchy as a person. Yixing warns me that it’s not normal how much I touch people, and that others will talk and that I’m too sensitive to hear people say stuff about me, but it’s a force of habit and-”

“Luhan, it’s fine... I’m a bit reserved as a person, and I’m not into the whole ‘big displays of affection’, but being with you is.. Nice. Comfortable. So if you like touching, I won’t mind. I won’t think anything weird of it.” Minseok beamed. 

If only he knew that Luhan’s touches when it concerned him were so much more than friendly pats.

…

  
  


They were now inside Minseok’s Seoul apartment, and Luhan whistled at how nice it was as Minseok asked him to give him his coat, so that he could put it on the hanger.

“Yeah,” Minseok laughed, “It’s really nice. Honestly, I wouldn’t be able to afford this apartment if it wasn’t for Sehun, one of my best friends, and also my boss. He pays me well, sometimes I think way too well,” he muttered the last part under his breath as he began straightening the magazines on his coffee table. 

Luhan sat on the white couch, admiring the house some more before he noticed a fluffy creature walking towards him. The cat jumped on the couch and deposited themselves on his lap, Luhan beginning to stroke the cat. 

“I see you’ve met the fiend. His name is Tan, and he loves being petted on the ears the most,” Minseok hinted conspiratorially as he placed two mugs of coffee on the table, pushing one closer to Luhan. He gratefully took the cup and drank, feeling his body unwind as he tasted the heavenly coffee. So heavenly that he couldn’t help the little moan of pleasure that escaped from his lips.

“What is this?” Luhan questioned, shifting slightly closer to Minseok. 

“It’s called Pellini.” Minseok giggled. “Its beans are really expensive, but the taste is incredible! And thanks to the fact that I’ve learned how to strain my own coffee, I can tailor the taste how I like.” Minseok talked proudly, and they talked about the coffee for a bit more, Luhan becoming so agitated that Tan jumped off of him, which caused them both to laugh. 

Out of habit, Luhan raised his arm to place it on Minseok’s shoulder, but just when he was about to regret the decision, Minseok pulled his arm even more steadily onto his shoulder. Facing Luhan, he said,

“I mean what I say. It’s fine to touch me. It’s not like I’m the type of guy to scream ‘No homo!’ when a guy is so much as near my general vicinity.” Luhan laughed at that, but it was much more reserved than his carefree way of laughing as his eyes had this note of seriousness in them. This escaped Minseok’s notice, as he had been busy turning on the TV with the remote. By the time Minseok faced Luhan again, the other man had already schooled his expression to not show the underlying pain.

“Listen, Minseok.. I feel terrible for telling you that the killer could be someone near you. I got a call from Sehun yesterday saying that you seemed a bit different, and that the investigation seemed to be worrying you-”

“Wait, how do you know Sehun again?” Minseok asked, genuinely curious. Luhan knew that he was trying to deflect the conversation a bit, as seen by the way he tilted his head in a knowing way, but he decided to answer anyway.

“Well, I’ve known Sehun for a few months. He’s a friend of a friend, if you will. Do you remember Tao?”

“What, the really tall, tan one?”

“Yep. They’re friends.” Minseok nodded to himself in understanding at that. “Anyway, as I was saying before you so rudely interrupted me-”

“Hey!” Minseok protested.

“See, you did it again!” Luhan accused, making Minseok roll his eyes and stick his tongue out childishly. “Fine! I’ll keep my mouth shut,” Minseok conceded, moving his hand along his lips as if in a zip motion.

“Good.”

“You’re kinky.”

“WHAT?” Luhan shouted, affronted, as Minseok stood up to go to his open kitchen counter.

“You know, shutting me up with a zip? C’mon, it was just a joke! Stop being so flustered,” Minseok laughed, this time with tears in his eyes because it seemed that Luhan was quite innocent. As Luhan was still spluttering away, Minseok took two wine glasses and some whiskey from his cupboard, which had been gifted to him on his 28th birthday party.

“Minseok!” Luhan said clearly, forcing Minseok to pay attention as he poured the whiskey out evenly.

“What?” he mumbled, his mind concentrating on the drinks rather than the words.

“You know… It’s okay to be scared.” Minseok stopped pouring.

“It’s actually perfectly normal to feel fear. It’s not an easy job… I personally don’t feel it, maybe because I’m sick and twisted because I get a high from catching criminals, but I’ve seen the fear you’ve been trying to hide clear as day, just like when Jongdae had to kill a man on-field...”

Minseok approached Luhan and sat down, putting the glasses down not so gently that it caused for the liquid to slosh about, some even going on his pristine coffee table. As his fingers were strangling the wine glass, Luhan took his smaller fingers off them and held them in his own hands, holding them near his lips.

“It’s okay, you can be scared. Thanks to you, we will be that much closer to finding the killer, or two killers, if what you say is correct. So just let us protect you for a little while longer, and I will make sure not even a hair goes in your general direction.” Luhan continued.

“Look, Luhan ,” Minseok sighed, a little smile on his face, ”I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I actually work out a lot. I don’t really need to be protected, especially from a scrawny-looking guy like you!”

“Hey! I work out too!” Luhan rebutted, but his annoyed face only caused for Minseok’s smile to widen even more.

“What I meant to say was.. Thank you. I am scared, but when I see your goofy-looking face, somehow I feel better,” Minseok finished. Luhan went on to complain that he had an ‘amazingly handsome face, thank-you-very-much’, which Minseok called ‘pretty’ as he gulped down the whiskey, which caused the man to complain even more.

As they refilled drinks and spent time together, Luhan found out that Minseok had a sister. He had a stable and loving family. He had wanted to be a detective in the past, but chose to be an RJ instead. That his mum wrote his dad love letters, and he found it to be the most romantic thing in the world.

“You know, I’d want a love letter, just like how my dad got one from someone who loved him. Just once,” Minseok babbled, eyes closed and looking delirious. Luhan, not yet fully drunk, couldn’t help but look at the curve of Minseok’s nose, the way his lips were small and pink, they way he breathed. He shot up straight in his seat before he could stare more, grabbing the armrest of the couch, knowing that his head wasn’t the only thing that was throbbing, but his heart too.

“Yeah, yeah. That’s… pretty romantic.” Luhan said, staring at the now dark TV.

“It is!” Minseok screamed inebriated as he raised his glass in the air. Thankfully, it was empty. “It’s the most fucking romantic thing in the world! Nothing can top how my parents fell in love.. You know, Luhan. Let me tell you a little secret,” the black-haired man said as his fringe covered part of his eye, but the pinkness of his cheeks was still evident. 

“Come closer,” Minseok whispered, beckoning Luhan forward with his finger. And Luhan did, as if pulled in by a spell.

“Closer,” Minseok ordered even more. And Luhan went even closer, until he found their lips inches apart.

“You know… I don’t think I actually love Ara!” He giggled as he moved away happily, deciding to plonk his head on Luhan’s lap and stretching his legs out. Luhan sat still, not really knowing what to do. The guy he had a massive crush on was on his lap, telling him that he didn’t love his girlfriend. Even though he was weak, and had only dreamed of such an opportunity in his wildest dreams, Luhan knew that he would do nothing. Not even an out-of-place touch. Seeing how his first time had been with Yixing, and he hadn’t even remembered it, he had vowed to himself that he would always have sex sober....

Not that he was going to have sex with Minseok!

“You know,” Minseok said, stopping Luhan’s rampant thoughts. “I didn’t know love would be so hard… My parents found each other pretty quickly in high school, but I never had someone like that. The only girl close to that was Ara, but even then..” Minseok trailed off. 

At first, Luhan thought that he was pausing because he had something he was holding back from saying, but when he heard the soft little snores from the other man, he couldn’t help the silent scream that came from his lips as he mussed his hair. He had thought about getting up, but that didn’t seem possible without waking the other up. So Luhan sat there, the drunkenness eventually being a vehicle to help him fall asleep to Minseok-filled dreams…

....

Minseok woke up, not on his great king-sized bed, but on a human. It had been a while since he had fallen asleep on someone’s lap. The last time had been on his mum’s lap before going to the army, since he didn’t know if it was the right decision to take. He touched the corner of his lips because he felt a wetness there, only to realise that he had drooled yet again. Looking up, he saw the celestial features of none other than the detective. 

When they had first met each other, he hadn’t realised how much in common they really had. Yes, they were different, but they also had similar passions. Like football. Like music. He hadn’t made a friend so fast in his life ever, and he knew that he would never let anyone touch him like Luhan had done in the first few hours of meeting each other. 

He got up slowly to try and not wake the other man. Then, he wiped the sleeve of his shirt over the drool to clear it away. The first order of business was to do his daily chores, and then clean. So he did just that, leaving food for Tan, making a simple coffee with toast and eggs for two, and using his silent hoover all over the house. Instead of playing the music out loud like he was used to, he decided to plug in the earphones and bob his head to the beat, making as little noise as possible.

His painstaking methods to not make noise seemed to have worked well. In fact, almost too well, since Luhan woke up two hours later, where Minseok was finishing the last remnants of his breakfast. The brunette saw Minseok at the kitchen counter and approached him, sitting by one of the empty stools.

“And good morning to you too!” Minseok said cheerfully, causing Luhan to hold his ear in pain. Minseok chuckled a bit before sliding some pills near the coffee cup, Luhan gratefully accepting them. Instead of eating the food first and then taking the pills for the massive hangover that he probably had, Minseok saw the man literally gulp two with no hesitation, before downing the cup of coffee. 

“Now it’s a good morning,” Luhan said sheepishly, earning a light punch on his shoulder. They ate their breakfast in silence, Minseok because he preferred to eat silently, and Luhan because his mind was jogging to the events of the other night. Had there been a purpose to Minseok telling him that he didn’t love Ara? Was that a call to action to make his move, or was it something he felt like he couldn’t share with more long-time friends? Luhan had a sneaking suspicion that it was the latter, but he knew in his heart that he hoped for both.

“So, what are your plans today detective?” Minseok asked as he started moving around the house, and from the looks of it, preparing to take a shower as he grabbed a stray towel in one room, and a sponge from another. 

“I’m going on a mission today, actually,” Luhan commented, stifling a yawn even though this had been the longest that he had slept in a while. Sure, it hadn’t been the most comfortable position, but he had been in much, much worse sleeping arrangements.

“Ohh, sounds sexy, secret agent,” Minseok shouted from the open bathroom door, which just had to be right next to the kitchen, tempting Luhan to at least take a peak. But of course he didn’t, and wouldn’t if he could help it. Luhan laughed along at the joke, but his mind was elsewhere for a bit.

He felt his phone vibrating in his pocket, shaking him. It seemed that the Team M Groupchat was thriving.

Pandabear: So? Ge, did you do it?

Pandabear: Did you have sex with Minseok?

Pandabear: Tell us! We deserve to know as the Lumin shippers

Dae: Wow, we already have a name, huh?

Groupchat name changed to Lumin Shippers

Lu: Could you guys please stop that?

Lu: And no, we did absolutely NOTHING. We are just friends.

Yixing: Oof, it seems he got friendzoned.

Yifan: Lol I didn’t expect anything less from him. Pay up Yixing and Tao!

Pandabear: Noo, I’m so annoyed. I wanted the extra money…

Lu: Wait, you guys bet on us hooking up? Guys! We barely even know each other!

Dae: Who says you have to know each other to have sex? You’re living in the 1900’s hyung.

Lu: That’s not what I mean!

Luhan typed furiously on, changing the name of the group chat back to Team M.

“Listen, Minseok. I kinda need some backup for this mission, and it would be good to have a civilian like you there, to help with a broader perspective.. I know you talked about wanting to be a detective in the past, and this mission isn’t dangerous. It might also do good to go out of Seoul and-”

“Deal!” Minseok agreed, head poking out of the door. His dark locks were wet, making the strands glisten, and as he went back into the Narnia like bathroom, Luhan chided himself by pinching his cheek, only to make a sound of pain at realising that he wasn’t in some fantasy world, but reality. 

Minseok finally came out of the bathroom wearing an oversized white t-shirt and some baby blue shorts, sporting a loveable gummy smile as he towelled his hair. He decided to sit next to Luhan on the stool again.

“You’re free to take a shower,” Minseok said as he pointed to the bathroom door. Luhan bowed politely before going in, admiring how there was not only a shower, but a separate bath too. And it was all so spick and span that it was almost as if it was a showroom rather than a used bathroom. Deciding he didn’t want to waste too much time, Luhan opted for the shower, hanging his clothes over it before indulging in cleaning himself as he shampooed his hair, humming out a familiar tune, before softly singing it.

“What are you singing? It sounds really pretty,” came a voice from the side, being far _far_ too close that it shocked Luhan into silence, as well as covering his dignity. When he looked at the direction of the voice, he saw that Minseok was covering his eyes and walking slowly towards the shower, before tapping the glass with his palms and knowing for certain that he was in the shower’s vicinity. 

“Sorry, I wanted to give you your privacy, but I thought that maybe you didn’t want to walk out naked, so I brought you some clothes and a fresh towel. Don’t mind me,” Minseok said as he still covered his eyes, turning around at a slightly wrong angle that if Luhan hadn’t shouted “Stop!” he would’ve been inches away from banging his knee onto the bath.   
  


“Turn around 45 degrees clockwise,” Luhan instructed, and now Minseok could peek through his hand to see that he was directly in front of the door.

“By the way,” Luhan spoke once again, Minseok’s back facing him, “The song was called Like Rain, Like Music. If I was a trainee, I think I would’ve sang it,” Luhan said in a wistful tone. Minseok seemed to nod before walking out of the bathroom, allowing Luhan to lather in peace.

…

Minseok didn’t really know what he was doing or why he was acting like this. He never cared about naked bodies in general. Really, he was one of the first people who would be confident to strip down at the sauna and encourage others to do it. He really had no problem with it, and with any other friend, he would’ve walked in and even had a full-on conversation with them in the shower. That’s just how he grew up, feeling like he had to take care of his friends who were like little brothers to him. So when he went into the bathroom with Luhan in it, he had no idea why it had to be different. 

Luhan was a friend. Luhan was a man. Nothing wrong with it. 

So why did he cover his eyes like some virginal maiden? Minseok pinched the bridge of his nose as he paced around, before deciding to clean one of his frustrations away by making sure that every glass surface was as spotless as it could be. He rubbed and rubbed so furiously that when he felt two hands touch his waist, he couldn't help jumping half a metre in the air.

  
  


“Luhan! You scared me,” he laughed off, heart still pounding uncontrollably.

“Sorry, you seemed distracted,” Luhan smiled back, the picture of innocence. Luhan told him about the pretty simple mission they had- he would go in to a supermarket that seemed to be attacked by thieves a lot and would distract the clerk while Luhan installed a secret camera in a blind spot outside to help the police identify the thieves, since the owner seemed to be doing some shady business dealings. Luhan explained that even though it wasn’t technically his job, as he mostly worked with serial killers, there was a shortage of police officers, and sometimes it was good to not be on such intense cases.

So that’s how Minseok found himself talking about the best type of supermarket sushi to the clerk. Really, he wasn’t even a big fan of sushi, but he went on and on about it for ten minutes that his social skills were seriously being put to the test. Around friends he could talk just fine, even if he was a little reserved. But around strangers? He was the type of person who would always go to the self-service if he could to pay for things, because human interaction was an exhausting thing.

When glancing at the glass doors from time to time, anytime that he saw Luhan’s head poking out, or any other body part, Minseok would make a grand show of pointing at the sushi stack right there, even making the store clerk come out of his counter to peruse over the fine sushi. When he had started to run out about his sushi fascination, but he could still see Luhan busy installing the camera, he moved on to what was right next to the sushi… Eggs. 

Then, he had an absolutely thrilling talk on whether the chicken or the egg came first. It was safe to say that he didn’t think anyone was as passionate about that topic of conversation as the clerk, which wasted around five more minutes before Luhan came in, asking to buy a bottle of soju. Minseok, soon after Luhan bought the bottle, also left because he had exhausted his maximum social skills in front of strangers. As he waited for the door to automatically slide past, Minseok let out a huge sigh, which didn’t escape the detective, who simply put his arms around him as they walked to the car and sat in it.

“Thanks for the help, really. Everyone else is too swamped with work that this simple task was being neglected, and I didn’t know how to distract the clerk long enough to finish installing the camera,” Luhan explained, unscrewing the bottle cap and taking a swing, and then passing it to Minseok. Minseok grabbed it and drank slowly from it, the taste being slightly sweeter than he was used to.

“No problem.. And is this-” he started savouring the taste, “Strawberry soju?” 

“Yep!” Luhan commented as he took back the bottle and drank some more. Minseok, not wanting to get into a car accident, took the bottle from Luhan and closed the bottle, giving a warning glance at the brunette.

“Right, sorry, I am driving us home,” Luhan said with a knowing smile. But then he got quiet, which Minseok was getting more used to. “Say,” he began again. “Do you remember what you told me yesterday?”

“What did I tell you?” Minseok asked, fully facing Luhan. There was another pause, and Luhan’s facial features, which had been placid, now seemed to turn void. Cold.

“No, nothing. I’ll drive you home,” Luhan said, revving the engine and taking Minseok back in the short drive back to his house. But rather than the comforting silence that they had seemed to have before, now it felt tense, and distant. Minseok didn’t know if he had done or said anything wrong yesterday, since he had been too drunk to remember the events. Oh Gosh. Had he done something to Luhan? Had he confessed his ridiculous attraction to the man, but not in a romantic way, more like in a bro way? As he turned back to the detective to ask what had really happened in the night, the way he slammed the brakes indicated that he was already back at his apartment complex. Luhan held out his hand to the door, but Minseok wanted to stay to talk.

“Hey, Luhan if I’ve done something-”

“You’ve done nothing. Have a good night,” Luhan smiled, but it was so stretched out and rigid that it may as well have been from a corpse. Minseok chose to leave, slamming the door on his way out. He knew he wasn’t angry at Luhan, but he wasn’t a mind reader. He couldn’t interpret the other man, especially since they had known each other for so little time.

When he woke up the next morning, he had a barrage of text messages from Luhan, saying he was sorry if he came off rude and that he had a lot on his mind. Minseok chose to forgive him, but he noted the odd behaviour. It seemed that Tan sensed his sour mood, since he uncharacteristically pounced on Minseok while he was still in bed, allowing himself to be caressed. 

…

Their relationship blossomed for a few months, as they would meet every day at the coffee shop near the precinct. Before Minseok would go to work, Luhan would pick him up in his cluttered car, where he would complain about all his pending cases, as well as how Tao was fighting with him, or that Yixing wasn’t sleeping. Minseok would also talk about his favourite love letters from the other day, or that Sehun was acting like a cute brat. 

He had also become more friendly with the officer stationed with him called Officer Jongin, who was young and hardworking. Sea had gone off the radar, not sending any more letters to Minseok, and so had Heartless. So Minseok’s life soon resembled normality, as well as having a new best friend constantly around to talk to about things. Just these little conversations, followed by a nice coffee flavour after would prepare Minseok for the day. 

It still felt a bit weird how much Luhan would go above and beyond with him, the drive obviously being a waste of petrol, but he still chose to do it for Minseok. They also often slept over at each other’s houses, usually taking up each other’s couch. It was a comfortable, symbiotic thing. So much so that Ara demanded to have a date with Luhan. 

“Y-you what?!” Minseok stuttered, hoping that he was imagining the words that her lips were forming. They were currently eating at the Lovely Store, Myungsoo obviously in tow.

“I said, I want to know about this guy, Luhan. After all, he keeps stealing my boyfriend away from me!” She giggled, but Minseok felt no mirth from it. Minseok so badly wanted to say no, but they were in a public setting, and the last time that he had refused one of her requests, she became so angry that she had caused a mess. Being an introvert, it had been a terrifying and exhausting experience explaining to the police that his girlfriend had not been feeling well (lies), had too much to drink (even more lies) and that she was going through a tough time with life (absolutely not true). They had gotten off the hook, but it had been devastating to Minseok. So he didn’t really want to go through it again.

“S-sure,” he agreed, looking down at his food to hide his despair. There had been a very good reason why Minseok hid Luhan from Ara. Not only did she seem not to like him, but Luhan didn’t seem to really like her, even though he pretended to. At first, in their private conversations, Luhan had told Minseok that he felt like he could be much better off than Ara.

_"Minseokie, I told you- that night you said you didn’t love her. And I know you- you’re the most honest when you drink. So stop being with her,” he had garbled angrily as he ate his noodles back in Minseok’s apartment, as they had been getting ready to watch Arsenal play against Manchester United. _

_“Luhan.. It was a mistake. I’m not leaving her!” Minseok complained as he sat down to also start eating_.

Ara was a constant point of contention between them that three months in their friendship, Luhan had vowed to not speak of her if Minseok also decided not to talk about her. So as agreed, they had kept their peaceful relationship, acting as if Ara never really existed in their safe bubble. Which made Minseok feel not so guilty when they curled up on each other on the couch, arms encompassing one another. 

Ignoring Luhan’s too quick heartbeat.

Minseok decided to excuse himself to the bathroom, quickly typing out a message saying that he was inviting Luhan to dinner tomorrow. 

‘Ok, see u there ;)’ Luhan replied, excessive use of emojis as always. 

Minseok dreaded then typing,

‘Ara’s going to be there btw’. Which spawned a tirade of messages from Luhan, asking why he ever thought it would be a good idea. Minseok justified it in his head that if his best friend and his girlfriend weren't at least on neutral terms with each other, then they could never move on. So begrudgingly, he got Luhan to agree, although Minseok felt a pang of sadness when Luhan didn’t end their conversations as normal with a ‘love you Seokie xx’. It was just a little thing, and he had gotten used to Luhan professing his love for him (as friends, obviously), so it made him uncomfortable that there was a rift of silence between them. 

When he went back to the table, Ara was there, and she said,

“Min, you know what? Let’s do it at my place,” she said, throwing Minseok in a loop.

“Are you sure? Your place has always been off-limits,” Minseok argued as he sat down on his seat with slightly wobbly legs.

“And you’re my boyfriend! It only makes sense. I mean, we’ve been dating for almost a year, and you’ve only been the sweetest, most tolerant man. So, so considerate of me,” She said as she gave him a long kiss on the lips, pulling off with a loud smacking sound. “Tomorrow, at 6, yeah?” she finished, wiping the lipstick off his face

…

Minseok was holding a bottle of rose gold prosecco, having been driven here by a silent Luhan. They were both dressed in suits, and Minseok couldn’t lie, Luhan looked like a model with the way the black suit was fashioned around him. He just had this expensive air about him, as if he was a rich chaebol (and yes, Luhan had told him his family was rich, but he had cut himself from the expenses, until he was at least 30 and doing well as a detective). 

Minseok felt a bit like a little kid in an oversized suit since he was literally wearing his dad’s suit that he had used at prom. He had gotten more the height of his mother than his father, but at least it was a nice feeling suit. Before he rang the doorbell though, he wanted to talk to Luhan.

“Listen, Luhan. Whatever is going on with you, you have to tell me. I’m sorry I don’t understand. I’m sorry I’m not like Yixing who gets you-”

“What does this have to do with Yixing?” Luhan turned, fully facing Minseok. The shorter man huffed, arms flailing in the air before he went closer to Luhan’s face.

“I’m sorry that just because I haven’t fucked you, I can’t know why you act so Goddamn bipolar all the time! Sometimes being the sweetest and then acting like a shit friend, ignoring me when I’m just trying to help you!” Minseok whisper yelled, inches away from Luhan’s face now as he felt red from fury. 

He just wanted Luhan to be straight with him. Sure, after their months of friendship, they had very few secrets (including Yixing being his first love), but it still hurt that Luhan didn’t want to let go and fully trust him. But from the glistening of Luhan’s eyes, Minseok’s rage turned into something more sour, feeling as if he had said something that he maybe shouldn’t have. Luhan looked so broken, opening and then closing his mouth, pressing his lips together as he stopped himself from speaking.

“Luhan’ I’m sorry. Please, don’t keep quiet. Shout at me! Hit me if you want, but I can’t with this radio silence. It hurts,” Minseok’s voice cracked at the end, voice trembling as a tear, then two fell down his cheeks. Luhan, like he always did, wiped the tears away, even though there was clear pain in his own eyes. He held Minseok’s waist, as if he was steadying himself from a fall, and then began speaking.

“You know.. It’s not fair to bring up Xing,”

“I know, I’m sorry,” Minseok weeped, wiping at his eyes now that the tears wouldn’t stop, regretting bringing him up, knowing that obviously as Yixing and Luhan had been friends for years, their relationship made total sense being more trustworthy and honest than his and Luhan’s. Luhan directed Minseok’s face gently to look in his eyes, and he said the words that Minseok thought about, but clarified everything. 

Luhan coming out had been one thing, because it had changed their relationship slightly. It had changed it by making Minseok more aware of how Luhan was in front of other guys, and how Luhan had held back touching him. This, now, made so much sense why Luhan acted the way he did. Sometimes fine, sometimes angry, sometimes closed off. 

Minseok cupped Luhan’s face, apologising profusely for his insensitive comment, how he had been a jerk for pushing him and not trying to understand him, but Luhan shook his head repeatedly, telling Minseok that he didn’t know, and it wasn’t his fault. There was a lump in Minseok’s throat. A heaviness in his heart. Blood coursing through his veins. 

And he didn’t know how he could ever make it up to Luhan.

“Min!” A female voice shouted behind them, the excitement in her tone steadily declining as she saw the two men crying, in each other’s arms. She crossed her arms together across her floral dress, murmuring a not so happy,

“So lovely to see you too, Luhan.” That was their signal to get off each other, and Minseok went to hold Ara’s waist and kiss her on the cheek, hoping she would keep walking and ignore the situation. Even if she did, Minseok certainly couldn’t, still feeling like shit. 

Her apartment was a bit smaller than his own, having no real decoration, except flowers in vases everywhere. All their petals were red, no matter the flower, and candles were the only light source for the trio. The two men sat down awkwardly, leaving a third space between them for Ara.

“So.. where’s Myungsoo?” Minseok asked, wondering why there were only three chairs.

“Oh, didn’t I say? It’s just us three. I wanted to get to know your friend Luhan, that’s all,” Ara explained as she put down the entrée, which was a lobster platter. As she placed Minseok’s plate down, Luhan mumbled,

“Minseok is allergic to seafood,” which stopped Ara mid-plating. A crooked smile formed on her face as she turned to Minseok and said,

“Darling, you never told me you’re allergic!” with a faux-happy timbre.

“It’s my fault,” Minseok smiled tightly as he remembered specifically telling her when she made him a packed lunch, which had made her so angry that she never made him one again. Funny how she remembered that he had rejected her bento and not why. Minseok caught Luhan’s eye and gave him a quick nod of thanks.

The dinner continued on, there not being much conversation as Minseok munched on breadsticks until the main course.

“So, Luhan. You seem to be very friendly with my boyfriend. What do you do? How did you meet?” She asked, body fully in Luhan’s direction. He took a napkin, wiped his lips and faked through a smile in their dismal mood.

“Well.. I’m a detective. Nothing major or cool like in the movies,” he joked, no one really laughing along with him. “And.. er, I was always a big fan of Minseok’s show. It helped me when I felt… you know, stressed from work,” Luhan went on, as a force of habit, taking Minseok’s hand in his and looking at his eyes. Minseok interpreted the last few words as being ‘when I was depressed’, and Minseok found himself squeezing back in comfort at the hands entwined in his.

“That’s lovely,” Ara snapped, making Luhan turn back to her, and their moment was lost as Minseok cautiously put his hand back down under the table. Minseok wasn’t really in a talking mood, so whenever he was posed a question by his girlfriend, he answered noncommittally, preferring to stuff his mouth and chew as slowly as possible. This meant that Luhan was the one who was investigated, Minseok thinking that she was an even better detective than Luhan as she got his whole life story out in a matter of seconds. 

“That’s so fascinating, how you wanted to get away from the riches. So brave of - Ahhh!” She screamed, jumping up and away from the table. This made Minseok pay full attention as he went to Ara in a protective stance as she pointed at the table,

“It’s- it’s, “ she stuttered, petrified. “It’s an ant! Help, Minseok! It’s so big,” she kept screaming, and Luhan directed the ant in his palm before putting it on a windowsill and closing the window. When he came back, he saw Minseok comforting the crying girl, and he held back another sigh because he once again thought that his hopeless love was never going to happen. Sitting back down at the table, the couple followed suit, Ara still talking about how disgusting and grotesque the creature was. Minseok then chose to excuse himself to the bathroom, and Ara pointed to its general direction. 

Just as Luhan was taking another sip of water, he spotted another ant right on the table near Ara’s plate. She smiled at him, before banging down on it with her bare hand, annihilating the poor creature. Absentmindedly, she scraped away the blood on her palm, greeting back Minseok as if normal. 

After Heartless had gone cold, Luhan had suspected that Ara was involved in some way, Not based on anything concrete, but she was a cunning woman. Maybe it was also because his love for Minseok was blinding him into thinking that maybe, if he just got rid of her, he could be with him. But still, the dates of when she was in China and when Heartless was in China matched up. And by her display of her two-faced personality just now, he couldn’t help that his suspicions went up from 5% to 10%. It was a terrifyingly low probability, even for him, because she wasn’t skilled enough to massacre those bodies like Heartless did. But if only he could find a link, maybe an accomplice, then-

His phone started vibrating, which only happened when it was an emergency call from Yifan. He excused himself from the table, but did not miss the way Ara smiled gleefully at him.

“Yes, Yifan?” Luhan responded, alert.

“It seems Heartless struck again,” came the voice from the other side of the phone.

“What? But there was no letter, no nothing!” Luhan argued, trying but failing not to look at Ara as she still struck conversation with Minseok. 

“I said the same thing, but the modus operandi is the same. It’s not a copycat killer, because there’s a heart on the sleeve of this woman. She’s also been… dissected completely. She’s freshly killed too- couldn’t have been more than an hour ago. It’s terrible, but we need you here,” Yifan said. 

Luhan was squeezing the palms of his hands so tightly in a fist that he wasn’t surprised when liquid started pouring down. It seems that he had been wrong about his hunch, because his prime suspect had been sitting there pretty right in front of him for an hour. What a fucking perfect alibi. Almost too perfect…

“I’ll be there” Luhan seethed before hanging up the call. He went over to Minseok and as a big fuck you to Ara, whispered in his ear as he caressed Minseok’s jaw, just to see that rage once more in her eyes. 

“Thanks for the dinner, it was lovely,” he lied, before taking his coat and leaving.

At the crime scene, everything Yifan had confirmed was true. He saw Yixing near the body, and caught the gloves that he threw at him.

“She’s pretty. Has dyed red hair.”

“One of your types, right?” Luhan chuckled, crouching down with Yixing. He could see that there was a heart-shaped cut just there, on her sleeve. But when he looked more closely, the cut appeared imprecise and jagged, unlike the usual practised precision. He mentally noted that fact. 

All her body parts appeared there, but her organs were rearranged in such a way that Luhan could only feel sorry for when her family or friends had to identify her. Yifan was giving instructions from further away, and Jongdae approached the two Chinese men.

“Luhan, I have something important to discuss,” he started.

“Shoot,” Luhan said as he stood up, standing near Jongdae.

“I checked the printer for both letters, and it took a while, but I finally got the information, thanks to Tao’s help. The two different printers were from a university library. It’s from Hanyang university.” Luhan nodded along, trying to remember why it was such a key university.

“Also, the perfume you thought was there was from the Eros perfume brand. However, it’s a really popular perfume, so sorry about that dead-end,” Jongdae continued with a hint of anger in his voice, always harsh on himself when he experienced a failure.

“But! Heartless, or Sea, or whatever their name is left a little clue for us! No prints, but there was a glove fibre, and these gloves have this special silicon fibre that is only used in one university, and only by teachers in-

“Hayang university”

“Exactly. You catch on pretty quick, star detective!” Jongdae said with a clap on the back.

A memory that had been at the back of his brain rang clear in his mind.

_“So why are you preparing a gift for Myungsoo again? Shouldn’t you hate that guy?”_

_ “Yeah,” Minseok answered, “but Ara said that he’s doing really well as a teacher at uni,” Minseok said as he ate a baozi that Luhan had made for him, which Minseok had said ‘tasted like shit’, but he still ate happily. _

_ “What’s the uni again?” Luhan asked as he took some curly strands of Minseok's hair, wondering whether he would get a haircut soon. _

…

“Hanyang uni! Get an arrest warrant for a Park Myungsoo, a professor at Hanyang!” Luhan fervently commanded Jongdae, which he began preparing.

…

It had been a long few days, Luhan barely getting any rest as he had to compile all the (frankly, mostly circumstantial) evidence together with Team M, who were invigorated after catching Myungsoo, not very far from the scene of the crime. As they had read him his Marina rights, he had seemed nonchalant and uncaring, even having a smile on his face. It was creepy, to be frank. 

But finally, Luhan could rest on his bed. Maybe, just maybe he could figure out this whole mess. While Myungsoo fit half the profile of the killer, and the rest of the police force were congratulating Team M on the arrest, something still felt odd. Myungsoo didn’t give the usual serial killer vibe. And the dates of the murders (the ones back in China) didn’t match completely, being off by a day or two, except for the very first murder. But any more hesitation had also seemed unwise. As he typed the number sequence to his apartment, he hadn’t expected for Minseok to be there, sitting on his love couch.

“Hey,” Minseok had breathed.

“Hi,” Luhan threw back, throwing his jacket on a table, which Minseok immediately got up to take and fold neatly. Luhan stopped him in the act, saying,

“Stop being such a clean freak and relax once in a while,” in a sad voice. Minseok put the jacket back down on the table, only now it was fully folded.

“You know it makes me calm..” Minseok postulated, looking down at his constantly moving fingers. 

“Yes, I do,” Luhan replied as he was engulfed by his other couch that was adjacent to the love couch Minseok was sitting back on. “So what do I owe this unexpected visit?”

“I just.. Missed you. Missed us.”

“You did, huh?”

“Yes!” Minseok said assuredly. “Yes,” he replied more softly, sitting back on his couch. “I know I’ve said this so much it seems redundant, but I really really am sorry. You’re my best friend. I should’ve understood what you went through, not judged you. And obviously, my jealousy for Yixing clouded my judgement-”

“It’s fine, honestly. I should've explained,” Luhan dismissed Minseok, because they were both at fault, but it was also nobody’s fault. “You know you mean the world to me, and this… Depression, it’s not going away, and I don’t want you to go away, so we should just accept that you’re both part of my life and that I want you to stay, if that’s what you want.” 

“I do, I do.” Minseok forced himself to go next to Luhan, and to hug him. “I love you too, by the way. Sorry for never really saying that,” Minseok breathed on Luhan’s neck, leaving tingles. As he wrapped his arms around Minseok, he had felt that mini heart attack he had only read in books when those three magic words were said. Even if Minseok didn’t mean it the way he meant it.

“Nah, it’s okay. The two heart emojis were enough to convey the sentiment,” he laughed, which caused Minseok to punch him lightly in the gut, and for them to look each other in the eye and laugh, like they were so used to doing. But the two heart emojis and Minseok actually saying the words out loud was completely different. He didn't feel so… liberated, when he got the hearts like he did now. And as they prepared themselves for a ritual get together (were Luhan questioned Minseok on his weird jealousy for Yixing, which he vehemently denied), it all seemed to be... Okay, for now.

…

“Take a break, you deserve it. At least for a day,” Sehun greeted Minseok, who wasn’t scheduled a paid holiday until a few months.

“You’re not serious, right?” Minseok rolled his eyes, packing his letters in his bag. “I literally feel like I’m always on vacation. Tell me the truth- are you in love with me, Oh Sehun?” Minseok genuinely asked, which got him a snort and a hearty laugh as reply. “Make fun of me, but you’re the one who started this whole company for me!” he rebutted, the younger man still laughing his head off.

“Okay, yes I did that, but it’s because I love you, but not in that way! I just feel like you’ve worked so hard and made the company what it is today. The only reason I pay you so much is because we wouldn’t be doing this well without you, so you deserve a break.” Sehun went on.

“But won’t the company fall in a heap of fire and ashes if I’m not here, since I’m _soo_ important?” Minseok said in a mock-serious tone as Sehun pushed him out of the door, laughing away. 

Once kicked out, Minseok knew exactly what he had to do. He dialled a number he was sure would pick up his phone call.

“Hey,” Luhan answered.

“Hi Luhan. Do you want to go to the countryside with me for a one-day trip?”

“Huh?”

“Lu ge, please! Please!” Minseok whined, having recently found out that Luhan had a weird thing (one of his many quirks) of liking being talked to in Mandarin by Minseok, especially when he called him ge. Usually, Luhan would demand to be called ge, but Minseok used it more like a secret weapon to get Luhan to do whatever he wanted. Like now.

“Fine, tell me when to pick you up,” Luhan sighed into the phone, even though he knew that he would never refuse.

…

Obviously, Luhan had been a bit hasty in accepting the invitation. While driving with his GPS steadily guiding him the way, Minseok snoring peacefully on the passenger seat, he knew he had left a lot of unfinished business. His sudden vacation meant that Tao had to take all his jobs for the day (which were A LOT), but rather than his usual complaining, he had said that he would do everything for the sake “Of love to thrive!”, which had earned him a smack on the head from the shorter Luhan. 

Everyone on Team M, and even Captain Joonmyeon (who now regularly visited the office, but to secretly kiss Yifan rather than shout at him) who knew about the whole situation with Minseok had urged him on. Even though he kept telling them all that Minseok was probably straight, they had this weird hope that he would fall for Luhan, or he wouldn’t put up with all his antics. 

Well, okay, Minseok had never said that he was straight. But when he had come out to him, he would’ve thought that Minseok would have done so too, if there was anything there...

_“Wow, I wish I could touch those thighs,” Luhan had drooled as they were watching another football match._

_ “Are you going to say no homo? Because I hate when guys say that unironically. And yes! I agree, his thighs are soo squishable but so muscular too!” Minseok had replied, still not drunk, but getting closer. _

_ “Erm, actually. Minseokie. I mean it in the homo way. As in, I’m.. Gay. If that’s not a problem..” Luhan had said, heart hammering away in terror. But that terror faded when he felt a hand on his own, _

_ “Well, you really do surprise me every day,” Minseok had smiled, bringing Luhan even closer to him on the couch, “Obviously it’s not a problem. I’m glad you could trust me to tell me about your sexuality. It must’ve been hard,” Minseok had said as he stroked Luhan’s head as if he was a child. It had been comforting, telling Minseok all the embarrassing stories of being gay, as well as his flings and exes. _

_ “No wonder! I was wondering a) why such a handsome guy like you didn’t have anyone and b) why you’re so fucking close to Yixing! It all makes sense now!” By this point, Minseok was completely drunk, but so was Luhan, and they shared even more awkward stories about growing up. _ But not once did Minseok mention anything about liking guys or sexual experiences with guys or.. Nothing.

So anyone watching from a distance could tell how dumb he was, going for a straight guy who not only had a girlfriend, but also being at his every beck and call, driving 3 hours to the countryside for him. Minseok had offered to pay for the train fare, but that was not only really expensive, but it was also a 6-hour train journey, which they were both not really up for. 

Then, Minseok offered to drive, but Luhan didn’t trust the man after letting him drive his car once because ‘I have a driving license, I got it when I was pretty young but never got the car’, which should’ve rang warning bells as it had been the most dangerous drive of his life, and he outright refused Minseok. 

They were only halfway through their journey, Minseok opting to sleep because he had been late packing the ‘necessities’, and Luhan hummed quietly to himself to stave off the boredom, and any remnant sleepiness that the coffee couldn't battle. At some point, Minseok woke up, and started humming with Luhan, his eyes staying closed, before belting out the lyrics to various songs. Whenever it was a Mandarin song, Luhan noted that Minseok would say two or three words wrong, but he was still impressed by how well he had mastered Mandarin.

“Why work so hard to learn it?” Luhan laughed as they were close to their destination.

“Mmm..” Minseok contemplated a bit, before saying, “Maybe it was fate. Maybe I knew I would meet a handsome Chinese man in my future, so I better work hard so that he can think I’m really cool,” Minseok laughed. 

“Well, past you was right,” Luhan smiled, turning into the driveway of a small country house. 

Minseok went to take the bags, carrying them all with ease as he unlocked the door. Luhan knew that this used to be Minseok’s grandparents’ house, before they moved back in the city. They never had the heart to sell it off, so they just kept it like a home away from home. 

The wooden decor was inviting, and even the mismatched furniture had a lot of warmth wrapped around it. After putting their belongings in the wardrobe, Minseok took out a football and chest passed it to Luhan, who caught it in a daze. Then, they ran outside to play football, which was one of their several rituals. 

Even though Luhan had bragged about being the best striker of Shanghai at some point, Minseok was no amateur, their first time playing together absolutely trashing Luhan because he had severely underestimated him, realising this when Minseok said,

“By the way, in high school I was also a pretty big deal with football. I was actually hounded by scouts, but I never wanted to join a team. It was only a good hobby of mine,” he had grinned in his mischievous way, making Luhan fall even more madly in love with him.

This time, Luhan managed to win, albeit by only a few points. Still, he felt proud, and didn’t once stop gloating about it. It was getting darker, the moon already up in the sky, but the black-haired man directed the brunette farther away to the house. So far away in fact, that Luhan could no longer see the house when they reached their destination, as the sky was not only pitch black, but they had been walking for a good bit. 

“This! Is my secret abode. Welcome, mere mortal!” Minseok cackled, arms in the air as if it was all an extravagant affair. And it was, as seen by the shimmering lake that seemed to go on for miles, stretched out before them. A little ‘wow’ escaped from Luhan, making Minseok sport a proud smile.

“Even though my grandparents aren’t great swimmers, this was the main reason why they bought this place... “ he reminisced.

“It’s beautiful,” Luhan grinned. 

“And you know what’s even more fun than staring at this beautiful lake?” Minseok began as he started taking his socks off, before taking his shirt away and then everything. Luhan had been too distracted staring at Minseok’s toned body, and those thighs. He couldn’t even compare with the other guy he had been drooling about to Minseok, not when he had a literal Adonis near him this whole time. 

And Luhan was definitely not looking at his dick. Definitely not. 

“Skinny dipping!” Minseok screamed as he jumped in the water, swimming further away from the shore. The splash from his jump caused for Luhan to also get drenched as he stood there in shock, pointing at his sodden clothing.

“You’re so paying for the washing!”

“Well.. You’re already wet, so you may as well jump in!” Minseok urged, from time to time disappearing in the dark whirlpool. Not having anything to lose, Luhan also took off his clothes and jumped in, splashing water all over Minseok. They both laughed heartily, swiping water at each other and diving deeper to torment each other.

When Luhan finally caught Minseok in a back hug, he was then acutely aware that they were both in a pool. Naked.

As Minseok turned around, the smiles from before were now hidden, and under the moonlight, Minseok looked even more gorgeous than he ever did before. Even though he knew it was wrong to pursue him. Knew it was wrong to try. Luhan still couldn’t stop the magnetic attraction between them. The silence seemed to say everything, and he felt Minseok inching closer too.

At first, it was a light pressure. 

A short, tender kiss. 

But then, Luhan couldn’t help himself and grabbed Minseok’s head and waist, kissing more. Harder.

**Harder.**

He tasted so sweet, so good, and Luhan couldn’t get enough. He wanted, no needed more. So he deepened the kiss, tentatively trying to pry Minseok’s lips open with his tongue. At first, his tongue clashed with teeth, but then he felt the warm tongue twirl with his own. Luhan licked, sucked and his every move was reciprocated in kind, Minseok loving, _actually_ loving him. Their breathy moans lingered and mixed together as they held on to each other more strongly, succumbing to each other's taste.

Until it stopped. 

They ran out of air; Minseok pushed him away. 

Luhan felt like he was drowning. Minseok’s figure swam away, putting on his shorts and taking the rest of the clothing off the grass, his escape not being slow enough. Luhan, after stopping the panic welling in him, began swearing at himself as he also tried to wear his skinny jeans while cursing out profanities.

“Fuck, shit! I messed up. I ruined everything!” He repeated like a mantra, the jeans causing even more anguish as they were struggling to get back up over his thighs, before finally going up. He grabbed his shirt and shoes before sprinting to Minseok. One aspect of football he had always been better at than Minseok was the sprinting, and he forced himself to go harder at it, until he could see Minseok’s retreating figure enter the back of the house. 

It seemed that he had locked himself in the room, because Luhan kept pounding on it to no avail. 

“Minseok! Minseok! I’m sorry, please open the door!” He recited over and over again, knuckles hurting from the force of the knocks. He was so desperate that he even attempted to open the door with his shoulder, but Minseok opened the door before he could cause any bodily damage. But rather than facing him, Minseok retreated away at the window. Luhan stalked closer to him and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, as Minseok was still facing away.

“Minseok. Minseokie, look at me!” Luhan pleaded with him, voice distraught. “Please, please don’t ignore me,” he began crying onto the pale skin.

“You know what’s funny?” Minseok started, but there was no humour in his voice as he still faced toward the window. 

“I knew you were trouble for me. I told myself, don’t feel these things for a guy again. Not again Minseok, unless you want what happened last time to happen,” Minseok rambled on, Luhan staying silent at hearing the words_‘again’_. Minseok had never told him anything about this. And the black-haired man turned, but his eyes were devoid of emotion. Gone somewhere else.

  
  
  


“Do you know why I went to the military early?” There was a pause, neither saying anything. “My mum and dad always talked to me about ‘true love’, and I thought I had been played a fucking joke when I fell for the captain of the football team in my senior year. So, like the idiot I was, I wrote him a love letter,” He laughed, again with a hollow sound. “I didn’t wait for a reply. Not when I saw the way he looked at me the next day, graduation day. So I ran, terrified he told people. Luckily, the bastard didn’t, but I thought that when I came back, I could fall for a woman. You know? Be normal again.”

“Minseokie,” Luhan said as he gently touched Minseok’s cheek with the back of his hand, “It’s okay to be bi-”

“Is it fucking really? Is it worth the hiding, the disgusted faces?” Minseok exploded, slapping Luhan’s hand away from him. Minseok once again tried to run, but Luhan this time had gained some strength and trapped Minseok in his arms as he flailed around erratically, screaming, “Let me go Luhan!” repeatedly.

“Minseok!” Luhan shouted desperately. “Minseok, you accepted me! I’m gay, and you accepted me. So why can’t you accept yourself? Why did you pretend that there was nothing between us, when I’ve felt it all this time and thought I was imagining it?” Luhan cried, which stopped Minseok’s movements. 

“Because… I didn't want to face reality, and I don't know if I can yet,” Minseok finished, taking Luhan’s hands off him, but now with ease. He began packing his clothes, the two men saying nothing to each other. Even when Minseok had left for good, all Luhan could think was how Minseok was going to go home, whether he would be safe,

Whether that kiss meant as much to Minseok as it meant to him.

...

  
  


Minseok had booked a last-minute train ride home, which had been fucking expensive, but he knew that there was no way that he would take a car ride back with Luhan. Knowing the brunette, he would’ve suffered through the awkwardness to get him home, since he loved being a knight in shining armour. But Minseok didn’t want that. He wanted calm. He wanted peace.

Looking out at the window seat view, endless green pastures greeted him, until around the five-hour mark, he finally saw city buildings. 

Luhan was probably long home, and hopefully resting. 

_Luhan. Luhan. Luhan._ That’s all he could fucking think about. How- if he hadn’t stopped the kiss, he would have gone further. Maybe even cheated in completely every way.

_Oh._ He had to face Ara and tell her that he had cheated on her. 

He snorted to himself at the thought of that guy in his year. His name had been Homin. He had been tall, smart, athletic. Everything he wanted to be. Everything he wanted. 

When he had rushed home after graduation to his sister, he had warned her that he had done something that could shame their family, and didn’t know what to do. Obviously, she had comforted him by saying he could never do anything like that, since she was always proud of him, but he knew that maybe she had an inkling of what the elephant in the room was. 

On a whim, she had suggested the military, which Minseok had latched onto like a hungry predator. It seemed to have worked, because he had brainwashed himself to lock any attractiveness he found deep within the wells of the heart. Since he was still attracted to women, it hadn’t been too difficult, but then Luhan just had to come and slowly, yet surely, unlock the lock he had barricaded for a decade. 

‘Next stop, Seoul. Next stop, Seoul.’

Next stop, Ara.

…

He was sat in her apartment for the second time ever, and he had almost thought she would sack him away, but she had invited him in, asking him to excuse the mess. It wasn’t really messy, as it was just as uncluttered as before. What was making him nauseous was the pungent smell of flowers, as she had installed even more vases with a couple dozen more flowers. She offered tea, but he refused, and she sat down next to his chair, worried.

“Let’s break up.” Minseok didn’t think he would be so blunt, but he didn’t want to mince his words like he usually did.

“T-there must be some sort of mistake. Did I do anything wrong-”

“I cheated on you,” Minseok let out, now not able to look her in the eye. The hand that was once on his fell to hang limp, as if her body was a ragdoll. 

“W-with?” She got out the words painfully. There was a moment of hesitation. After,

“Luhan.”

A slap resounded in the air. 

It was so loud that it was the only thing that was ringing in his ear for a whole minute. Minseok turned to look back at Ara and said,

“I-” which only got him another slap. And another. And another.

“I completely deserve this Ara. And I’m sorry for not breaking up with you before going this far,” Minseok tried to speak as his cheek was pulsing in pain.

“I refuse.”

“What? But-”

“I refuse. You’re mine to monopolise Minseok! Mine only! I can’t believe that vermin got you, the goody-two-shoes, to cheat on me!” Ara lashed out, now going to smash all her vases one by one as Minseok looked on, horrified.

“I knew it from his eyes! When I first saw him!” Crash. “He was holding you like he never wanted to let you go!” Crash. “And I let him play his little game, thinking you of all people wouldn’t betray me!” Crash. Minseok carefully walked up to her and saw her bloodied hands from the broken vase shards, but before he could say anything, she thundered, “Get out. GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT!” 

Minseok ran, incredibly sorry as a loud crash from behind him indicated that it had almost missed him. Crying, and feeling terrible, he didn’t know who to go to but… him.

Taking the cab, he didn’t realise how fast the journey was as he was dreading the whole thing again. Would he push him away, like he rightly should? Or would he…

Minseok stopped thinking.

He typed in the familiar key code, the one he had been so happy to get when Luhan had said that he felt bad for always crashing at his, and that Minseok could also crash at his. 

The key code made a ding. Incorrect.

He tried again, this time typing the code more carefully.

Wrong again.

This time, he rushed it, feeling so helpless as it constantly refused to let him enter. 

He crumbled to the floor, defeated. 

  
  
  
  


He heard more than saw the door open, and felt more than saw Luhan pull him up, and kiss him long and hard on the lips. Throughout it, Minseok had kept his eyes open, disbelieving of the man being right in front of him.

“Y-you changed the code” Minseok stuttered sadly as Luhan banged the door shut and began kissing Minseok, mouths attached to each other. They stumbled around, on the couch, on a table, taking articles of clothes off each other. By the time they were in bed, only their trousers remained.

“Should we talk?” Minseok asked, lips swollen from having been kissed so furiously.

“Later?” Luhan asked, grateful when he received a nod from the other man. 

He began his ministrations, kissing Minseok lightly on the chest, taking a nipple and slowly sucking on it, which caused Minseok to moan in a restrained manner. But Luhan wanted to hear him loudly, clearly. He wanted to forget all the barriers that existed between them. Ara. Their society,

Because at the end of the day, the biggest barrier, Minseok, had finally succumbed, and everything else seemed as if it would fall into place. 

They began grinding on each other, at first slow, worried, but soon the friction was electrifying as Minseok grabbed Luhan’s hair and pushed him down, devouring his tongue. 

Now impatient, Minseok started unbuttoning Luhan’s jeans, taking the jeans and his shorts down with him. When he saw the member between Luhan’s legs, Minseok got a bit lightheaded, his movements completely halting. Luhan noticed this, kissed Minseok’s temple lightly and asked,

“This is your first time, isn’t it?” Kissing Minseok’s cheek, nose and lips in rotation, which caused happy little giggles to come out of Minseok. This seemed to spur some courage in him, because Luhan found himself lying on the mattress, their positions now reversed. He gave an arched brow at Minseok, who began kissing his neck and then sucking purposeful marks right near his ear, which caused breathy moans from Luhan.

“Yes,” he said between hickeys. “But I’m sure you’ll be a great teacher,” he continued, now taking off his own trousers and tossing them away in a dark corner of the room. They were fully naked, and Minseok looked at Luhan expectantly, before the other man realised what he was trying to insinuate.

“Oh! I’ll get the.. Uh” He muttered, Luhan now getting more conscious about what they were actually going to do. Kim Minseok. His crush and now the man he was in love with, on his bed.

“Lube and condom?” Minseok laughed.

“Uh, yeah,” Luhan confirmed. When he took them from his bedside drawer, his face was a light pink, even in the mild darkness. It was cute how he accidentally dropped both items once he saw Minseok sprawled out on the bed again. 

“S-should I or..?” Luhan said uncertainty.

“If someone was looking at us, they may think that you were the anal virgin and not I,”

“M-minseok!” Luhan stuttered, now fully red. He was still holding the condom and lube like an amateur, so Minseok grabbed the condom, ripped it with his teeth and put it on Luhan’s penis before Luhan could waste any more time.

“For now, I’ll give you the honour of being my first, so you better not suck,” Minseok stuck his tongue out, which quickly turned into a moan as Luhan’s slicked up finger entered him. 

At first, it was a foreign feeling, and quite uncomfortable too even with the generous amount of lube. As always, Luhan was careful and kind and when he heard the little grunts of discomfort turn into little pleas of sighs and “more”’s, Luhan got slightly rougher, and that special spot sparked a fire as Minseok let out a loud moan.

“More, Luhan, more!” Minseok moaned as he grabbed the railings. 

At first, it had fucking hurt like a bitch, so much so that he couldn’t even pretend for Luhan, even though he had that sad puppy look of not being able to please Minseok. But the way it was going, Minseok felt like he could definitely get used to this new sensation. 

Just as he was on the brink of ultimate pleasure-

Luhan stopped. 

Minseok glared at him with sharp eyes, and he gave Minseok a quick peck before positioning himself to enter. 

“I don’t want you to cum just yet,” Luhan giggled childishly, and Minseok pulled him in to clash tongues again, and the loss of oxygen seemed to only make Minseok even more excited. 

Excited enough that when Luhan finally entered, he felt like he hadn’t prepared near enough for the experience, even though they had done foreplay for a good ten minutes. It took a bit of time for Luhan to enter, since Minseok was so inexperienced that he didn’t want to hurt him or cause him to bleed, so they went little by little.

But the wait was so excruciating that Minseok wrapped his legs around Luhan to make the process faster, now moaning again in pleasure rather than pain. And what could Luhan do but obey?

He thrusted in, harder and quicker each time. Minseok’s words of pleasure and praise spurring him on, and Luhan kept going, feeling like he was breaking Minseok and loving every minute. The thrusts followed the rhythm of Minseok’s more erratic moans, and even Luhan couldn't help the carnal sounds that emanated from him. He wanted Minseok to be his. 

To be with him. 

To love him.

And as Minseok was reaching that climax yet again, Luhan was ecstatic to hear the words that he had wanted Minseok to mean,

“I love- ah, I love you, I love you Luhan, so fucking much!” he moaned in repetition, the white liquid spurting on his small but well-toned body, and Luhan also chased after his own release, feet curling as he collapsed onto Minseok.

“I love you too Minseok,” Luhan murmured, as if it was a secret only them two knew. 

He kissed Minseok’s cheek over and over again, Minseok doing him the favour of taking off the filled condom jokingly and throwing it in the bin, before hugging Luhan again and kissing each other lovingly.

Oh, how much they loved each other.

  
  
  


When Minseok woke up, he really looked at Luhan for the first time in a while. He knew he had been avoiding even thinking about his looks, but he really was lucky to get such a perfect guy with a perfect personality. He also thought back to the night before, how sweet, and then how much of a hungry monster he had been, and couldn’t help but kiss Luhan on the lips. Clearly, he had woken up at some point, because he began reciprocating the kisses with full intensity.

“Ok,ok, you can stop now!” Minseok shouted in between kisses.

“Oh yeah? Even though I gave you such a magical experience last night?” Luhan said as he kissed lower, around the neck area.

“We need to talk,” Minseok said as he pushed Luhan gently away. 

Luhan sat up and brought Minseok up too, holding onto his hands in case Minseok wanted to escape from him again.

“So, I broke up with Ara,” Minseok started, to which got him a dozen more kisses on the lips, which he swatted away (even though he enjoyed them very much). “But she’s still mad, so I think I’ll talk to her again.” Luhan nodded along, fully serious now. “Luhan.. This is my first serious relationship with a guy ever,”

“And I know that,” Luhan said calmly as he kissed Minseok’s forehead.

“And.. I just want you to know that it may be a bit hard for me to fully get to terms with it.. I may be more cautious when we are outside, and I still haven’t come out to my parents but..”

“But baby steps, right?” Luhan grinned.

“Baby steps,” Minseok agreed, now once again being smothered by kisses.

....

Minseok was at work and it was midnight. He kept on getting adorable texts from Luhan to try and not get home too late, using the angry emoji often even though Luhan hardly had a temper. It had been a few days since dating him and even though he had wanted to keep it private, it seemed that his friends knew him too well- from Ara being a non-existent presence to Luhan coming every day and giving him gifts, it was only a matter of time before Sehun, Chanyeol and Baekhyun had figured it out, and they hadn’t judged him, but supported him, which was all he could ask for. 

He even had the courage to text his sister that he had a boyfriend, and she congratulated him, no questions asked. Well, one question. She had wanted to know what he looked like as her_‘brother only deserves the best’_. From the picture of Luhan he had secretly taken of him in bed, she had instantly approved and ordered him to ‘bring the hottie home’, which he had laughed at.

He was now in the RJ room, for little reason other than it had a computer and it felt more homely than the research room. He stretched his limbs in his seat, yawning loudly when he heard a footstep behind him. He turned around only to find Ara there, her face pale and her body much thinner than he remembered it.

“Hey.. Ara. I wanted to talk to you actually,” Minseok stood up, walking slowly toward her because she seemed so frail. 

He knew that he had been in the wrong, and he would never forgive himself for cheating on her. But still, if there was a way they could talk, he wanted to try. 

He held onto her exposed hand, whispering to try and get her to say anything when he saw a glint, a flash of something. 

The next thing he knew, there was a large knife stuck on his shoulder, and when she pulled it out, he never felt such surging pain.

Minseok screamed, falling down onto the floor, legs weak. Ara seemed to laugh to herself.

“Oh my sweet, stupid Min. How could you forget me? I did tell you that you were next!” She crouched down at his level, pointing her knife in a way that showed she wanted to carve something on his cheek.

A heart.

“Y-you’re-?”

“Heartless? Yep, that’s me! Although your cute nickname for me is much more... mysterious!” Ara laughed once again, stabbing at the wound she had already created, causing Minseok to once again scream out in pain, tears forming at the corners of his eyes.

He didn’t want to die. He didn’t want to die. He finally found love and-!

“But Myungsoo? He was.. Arrested..” He coughed out, the pain becoming too intense.

“Yes, he did it for me. Your boyfriend was getting too close, and Myungsoo was willing to take the fall for me,” she giggled.

“So.. Why?”

“Why? Oh Min, my cute Min. Didn’t I tell you? You’re my next guy. Yes, I had those other flings, but they weren’t cheating because my heart always belonged to you! And now yours will belong to me too,” she recited calmly while his blood dripped on the floor from her weapon. 

Acting quickly, Minseok kicked her out of the way. She fell to the floor, but didn’t seem fazed as he rushed out of the room while holding his shoulder wound. He tried to open the doors to different rooms, but they were all locked. When he arrived at the elevator, he pressed the button, as if he was going to get on it, and rushed down the stairs, hoping that it would trick her. 

He could barely breathe. He could barely think. All he wished for was Luhan, Luhan, Luhan. 

He didn’t know if he could make it, even if he did escape Ara. 

Of course it was Ara! He had never really suspected Ara because she had always acted squeamish about blood. He should’ve guessed it was all an act to trap him.

As he waddled down the stairs, he took his phone out of his back pocket and texted Luhan that Ara wanted to kill him, as well as a quick police call.

  
“None have loved me as deeply as you!” Ara laughed from a floor above as Minseok cursed, angry that his plan had failed. It had probably been the blood that had fallen on the floor that had alerted her, the taste and stench of red iron clinging to him. 

...If there was one person he wanted to see, before he died, he wanted it to be Luhan.

He wanted to tell him one last time that he loved him.

  
  
  
  


As the ending of the staircase came near, and so did the emergency exit, the light, fast footsteps of the devil behind him were quickly catching up to him. Having held his open wound this whole time, it seemed that there was nothing he could do to make it stop bleeding. 

To make her chase stop.

He thought he imagined Luhan opening the door, and as he felt faint, and was on the verge of collapse, he murmured the last words he wanted to say.

…

“Beep. Beep. Beep.” 

Those were the first sounds Minseok heard before he opened his eyes, and when he saw his boyfriend, he knew that he was still alive. 

That was reconfirmed by the searing pain from his left shoulder as he tried to reach out for Luhan.

“Shush, shush, it’s okay darling. You’re safe.” Luhan comforted Minseok by kissing him once on the forehead, before taking a hold of his hand.

Groggily, Minseok asked, “What happened?” 

“Well,” Luhan began, “Ara was Heartless. Well, half of Heartless. Myungsoo confessed today that she helped him by providing him with dead bodies to tamper with, while she got to kill any ex-lovers that wronged her. Sometimes, he needed to understand more the female anatomy with surgery, so he asked her to also kill women.”

“So.. I was almost going to be murdered?” Minseok let out a breath of bewilderment.

“Yep… It seems that her first kill was by ‘accident’” Luhan emphasised with air quotes, “but she wanted someone to help her hide the crime, so she enlisted Myungsoo while they studied together in China. She’s a sociopath who’s been hiding her true persona. I’m surprised she kept you alive this long, to be honest Minseokie,” Luhan said with a sad tone of voice as he nervously played with Minseok’s fingers.

“... Will she go to prison?”

“Yep. There’s enough evidence. Maybe far too much evidence. Her house was found to be completely reactive against luminol, and the reason she had so many flowers was to hide the stench, which is also similar to the perfume she used in that second letter. Even though she never actually wore it, she placed it as a red herring to deter us.” Luhan continued talking more about the investigation, making Minseok slowly drift into a slumber.

The detective once again kissed the other man on the forehead and said, “Get some rest,”

  
  


…

Minseok was back at work after a few months, much to the chagrin of everyone who knew him. Sehun had threatened to fire him on the spot. Luhan wanted to keep him trapped at the hospital. Chanyeol and Baekyun had gone to his house every day to make sure that he stayed there. But after his speedy recovery, he knew that he could just shove the brats away if they tried to stop him.

So not only did he have Sehun queueing him in like usual for his big comeback, but even Luhan was on the other side of the glass, which made Minseok roll his eyes and want to kiss the lights out of him simultaneously. 

He actually had a visit from his family a few days before going back to work, and with Luhan living in his apartment permanently now, he knew that he would have to tell them at some point. His parents had been a bit surprised, understandably, but now they seemed to be enamoured with Luhan after seeing _‘how well he treats our son’_. Of course, his little sister had tried to steal him away, but Minseok had simply given her the middle finger as he made out with his boyfriend.

Apparently, Luhan had also spilled to his group. They all seemed happy for them as Minseok had gotten a lot closer to them, including Joonmyeon, who liked to say that they were best friends to everyone, as well as to complain about Yifan to him and how their boyfriends are stupid (and he agreed completely). 

Like before, Luhan had good days and bad days. He hadn’t really known Luhan on his bad days pre-relationship because he chose to hide himself away, rather than to communicate with other people. But after moving in together, the sheer grandeur of his emotions had been a tough thing for both of them to go through. Sometimes Luhan wouldn’t talk or eat. Sometimes he would keep screaming. Other days he seemed almost happy. They just went through it day by day, minute by minute. And Luhan was getting better, so that was all Minseok could ask for.

“Welcome to Heartthrob, with cupid Kim Minseok at your service! Today we have.. Only one letter? That’s strange. I think my boss is holding back letters because of my injury,” he rolled his eyes, staring directly at Sehun who had a blank face. “Well, let’s read who it’s from… It’s... Luhan?” Minseok glanced up at the man in question, but he urged Minseok to read on.

“It says:

‘Hi dear, my Minseokie. It’s me, Luhan. You have never stopped telling me that your parents had the most romantic romance in the world. That love letters are the most valid way of confessing ones’ feelings. Well, we can’t let your parents beat us, can we? I am writing this letter as you are speaking to your parents now, post-talk about us. I.. I just can’t believe I have you. Like I told you before, I’m a guy who chases love. I'm in love with love. So when you started reading love letters, I listened for not only those pouring their souls out, but for you too. I now understand…’“ Minseok gave a watery laugh before starting again,

“I now understand why people find it so difficult to write love letters. Am I rambling too much? Or is this too short? What I really wanted to say was one thing and one thing only. Actually, two things. The first thing- I love you most in the world,” Luhan lip-synced as Minseok glanced up, tears streaming down the idiot’s face, and Minseok also having drops of salty water fall down.

“And I would do anything for you. I’m sorry to say this, but I already revealed our relationship to my parents, because you are too important to me. And they want to meet you- they say you must be the one because I’ve never even mentioned a partner anywhere near them. Which leads me to my final question- will’ ” Minseok choked up at the final words. 

The door opened and Luhan was standing there. The most amazing man in the world. Now on one knee, with a ring that Minseok had known he had been hiding in their sock drawer for two weeks, wondering when he would propose.

“Will you marry me, Kim Minseok?” Luhan asked, his hands trembling so much that Minseok thought the ring was going to drop on the floor. It was a basic silver band, exactly what he had told Luhan he wanted if he was ever going to get married.

“Yes,” Minseok laughed with rivulets streaming down as the ring was on his finger, and Luhan hugged him, the crew including Sehun, Baekhyun and Chanyeol, as well as a surprise visit from Team M all being there. As they got gifted flowers and congratulated, Minseok knew his parents were right.

True love did exist, and it felt fantastic.


End file.
